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July 24, 2005, 12:10 pm CDT

depression isnt obvious

Hi,

a girl I know, I would like to say friend, but actually we werent all that close, her son came to my house everyday to play with my son, and he always wanted to stay overnight and not go home. his home life wasn't very happy. his mother had a drug problem and a husband in prison, when I got to know her because of her son, she always needed something, money, me to watch her son, food, toilet paper. she didn't work, she lived on welfare $300 a month and food stamps, i tried helping her by offering work to get money she never could get it together to go do the work, so i backed off but i continued to let her son stay at my house all the time cuz i felt sorry for him, i treated him like one of my own kids. im a single mom with 4 kids no welfare no child support and i barely get by. so trying to help his mom out was hard, anyways last weekend his mom hung herself...her son luke found her and from what i can find out his real dad picked him up and took him to another town where the dad lives. there has been nothing in the newspaper, nothing about her dying i just heard it from people in our neighborhood. i can't get over feeling like i should of tried more to help her. it is just that she wouldn't help herself when given the opportunity to work to make money so i backed off. now i feel like i should of tried harder for lukes sake. i cant sleep at night, i keep seeing her hanging from a rope dying in my head how do i deal with this guilt?

 
July 24, 2005, 12:15 pm CDT

Depression

I know how it is to "try" and get out and exercise. But when the depression reaches it's ultimate high....that just doesn't work. I force myself to do things. I have been suicidal in the past....well....many times....several times....well never mind what I was going to say....just say....I was medically dead. Heck, some reason God keeps saying no. I just want to stop crying. I too have a difficult time telling my husband just how horrible I feel, not because he wouldn't understand, but because I don't want him to be afraid to go to work and leave me alone.

You said that you do not have any support groups in your "crappy town" you live in....so if I can be of support....YES!!! I would and will always do my best to help if I can. I do know the pain! Remember, I am here if you would like to start a support group.

Formally Nekocats....now.....Nekocats2 (new site change)

Who do I look for? Wish you the best...I don't mean to sound cheesy...but I do mean that! Lonliness is a horrible place to be. I write to you throughout my tears so forgive my typos.

I posted the message about the girl who hung herself.....please please listen to me, do what ever it takes to get help, support. i only wish i could of helped this young woman that hung herself (she lived on my street and her son was a friend of my sons) when I look back now I wished I would of tried hareder to help her. If you need someone to talk to e-mail me I don't know what I have to offer you, but I can listen and  I can care.

 

michelle

 
July 25, 2005, 6:06 am CDT

Family Business Sucks

I'm 40 yrs old and work for my father at his real estate office. It is a small business with about 20 employees. For 12 years I worked as his assistant, he is the broker, and everything was good. Then I discovered that the bookkeeper he employed was embezzling money and had been for years. She was paying all her bills, her housepayment, every thing and getting cash plus her weekly paychecks. My father never checked the check register or bank statements. Now I tried to tell him and he would put me off, until very bluntly I showed him copies of checks she forged, and copies of the check register that changed every week after she would correct them. So she was fired immediately and my father made me take over everything. Now the problem is I do all the bookkeeping, all the property management, all the office support and I was never formerly trained for accounting, I do everything from the taxes, payroll taxes, distribution of rental income, etc.  I can't keep up, I'm getting more behind everyday, the help he hires me is pathetic, I work overtime don't get no overtime, no benefits, no insurance, no nothing no raises and he tells me how bad I'm doing everyday cuz I'm not keeping up with everything. I want to quit but this is my kids future this business and I want to get them interested to help me. what do i do?

 

 

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