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Messages By: wildforce
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January 17, 2008, 8:33 am PST
 Quote From: wildforce kind of. I have ocd, aniexty, add. depression.. I can't stand for dust or the thought of raw meat, eggs. makes me a clean freak , but I can go pet the dog and make a sandwich after words with no problem. human contact doesn't bother me. I could share a carrot with my guiene pig, but fork that was around raw meat has to be washed and my hands right away. i can't sit in my living room watching tv and see dust on the shelf and enjoy the show without getting up and fixing it. or not having things balanced out on a shelf. I also have a hard time with things not having there proper place. It is funny how one thing that should repulse us doesn't and things that are so little do... to continue. my biggest fear factor however is chemicals. cleaning supplies. I have to use a steamer to clean because I freak out about cleaning chemicals. yet I can help a stray dog bleeding and have no fear of getting sick, but wash my counter down with pinesol and excpect me to make food on it forget it...my doctor put me on effexor xr and that has helped alot. so no you are not alone.... |
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March 26, 2008, 11:56 am PDT
I am a mother of three wonderful boys. All three have OCD. and ADHD . 2 have anxiety and depression and my 9 year old is bi-polar. all moms have days were they want to run away and as a mother with 3 boy who are gifted Im sure my days are more than others. As if my life wasn't busy enough I started an in home daycare for disabled and foster children because I knew how hard it was to trust anyone or find someone who is willing to deal with your children. When you find yourself ready to give up how can you exspect someone else to have the patience with them. My sons bi-polar got worse I had to give up my daycare to provide more one and one care for him. For the parents who don't have gifted children let me give you a little insight on what it feels like. you have days you feel so helpless and deflated that you don't know if you can even get out of bed. you feel like you don't have anymore fight in you but you know you are your childs voice so you have to go to the school and fight for the education your child needs and deserves, you have to fight the doctors, deal with agencies to get the help you know your child needs. some days you feel like your spinning your wheels and getting no were. you have the struggle of trying to keep a job that can fit around your childs needs. Don't get me wrong I love my children and wouldn't trade them for the world. They are my life. I had the advantage of having ADD and OCD my self so I have some insight on how they are feeling. however I never had to deal with bi-polar . I know how hard it is for me it has to be 10xs as hard for him. I know he doesn't pee in my candles, put holes in my walls, breaks everything I own , threaten to kill me or himself out of hatefulness. I know it's something he can't control . But when Your having a "bad day" as we call it is very hard not to take it personal. when your lying in bed at night afraid to go to sleep because he tells you of a dream he had were you were stabbed to death in your sleep and laughs about it. It's hard not to let dispear take control. I guess what I am saying is don't judge these women but try just for a minute to put yourself in there place give them credit for admitting they are in over there heads and are reaching out for help give them credit for not being one of those moms we see on the news who drown there children or buckle them in a car and drive it into a lake.. These are women still fighting for there kids. give them some credit for that. |
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March 27, 2008, 12:26 pm PDT
Quote From: uburns Get a life. Stop knocking my wife and how we live our life.This women accepts that our son is disabled and she has been his cheerleader.What you see in the few clips are not at all what goes on all the time.You did not see her working and struggling to teach our child to learn his alphabet or write.You did not see her laying in be with our son rubbing on him and singing to him.You saw him drop to the floor after he got off the bus because she said," Alex lets go potty." She should be an inspiration to parents.She would not give up on this child when others would have.When he was born that is when we first learned he was DS.Before his birth My wife started bleeding and we felt something was wrong like her body was trying to naturally abort the baby.We were scared.My wife asked the Dr. if anything was wrong and he did test and and assured her everything was fine.He not only missed the Down Syndrome but our son had a heart defect the Dr. missed.Right after our son was born the hospital drew a pictured diagram and said half of your sons heart is missing and he needs immediate medical attention.Oops they were looking at another childs chart.Now our son eventually had to have heart surgery just not that severe.Our son would have died at 6 months of age if not for this mother you keep bashing.Every day for a week she took him to the Dr. telling them something is seriously wrong.Then after he saw a different Dr. thanks to the persistence of my wife our son was hospitalized for having a life threatening illness especially due to his heart.This is the mother that gave him breathing treatments day and night.Our son got cellulitis of the face/head and swelled up life the elphant man, and his eyes swelled shut. Again my wife took him to a different Dr. everyday that week afraid for his life.This is recent. He went to the emergency room,the heart dr.,the ped,and eye Dr., and back to the Ped.She has felt that the cellulitis is what has helped to make his behaviors worst but the Dr.'s did not think so.My wifes mother was diagnoised with lung cancer and the Dr. were 96% sure they could save her life.They were wrong an actually cause my wifes mother to pass away sooner than she would have if they had not operated.Part of the problem with my wife is she has lost her faith in Dr.s due to this experience and the fact they did not know our child was going to be disabled.Before he got the cellulitis that same year a child at school bit our son.It was ugly.My wife had to get an attorney involved to get that child removed from the classroom to protect our son.Our sons behavior toward going to school has gotton worst and this is not the first time something has happened in a school here to our son.My wife had him moved from another school because he came home with bruises and soaking wet pullups.She put him at this school because it was supposed to be the best here.The attitude of the school with us and my wife about our sons human bite, they don't have to tell us if the child has aids, or any other horrible illness.The school said they have not seen our sons behavior get worst at school because of the bite.That is a lie.The next morning after our son was bitten when my wife got him up for school he said no.My wife said Alex it is time to get ready for school and he said "NO" and threw himself on the bed.Once he finally got to school he threw up.They called my wife.My wife is always there for our son helping him,teaching him,singing to him, and he loves to play games with her. She taught him how to play basketball , play chase, and he loves her.The word mean does not mean my wife is mean.He slapps all of us and when he does, we say Alex that is mean do not slapp.Once in a mall he threw his cup and hit and old lady in the head.My wife was so upset for the lady and then latter we worried the lady might sue us. Now you did not see this side of our life on this show.Why because my wife whom you say does not care wrote to these talk shows everyday trying to get help for us and our son and used whatever show idea she could to get on the show.Thank goodness they listened.Thank goodness for Dr. Phil.some of these things were said so she could get us on the show so we would be able to get more resources for our son, Our state is at the bottom of the list as far as resources for autism go, we were told that there was a chance he could be born with down syndrome because of the size of his head , this was a high risk specialist reading a ultra sound , and alex is with us , and will always be with us I hope this clears things up, also resources end when the child turns three in our state , they come and take all the equipment away as far as ot,pt and speech equipment , he did not have a dg. of autism at that time and im not sure if there were resources for that . i have bcbs insurance and it does not cover any ot,pt or speech , we have learned to have a different outlook on life since then, things that bother other people seem not to be as important to us, we have more important issues. One thing I learned in raising three gifted children is not care what others think of you. You know you are doing right for your child. Bless you for all you do do for Alex know there are people in your corner.
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April 4, 2008, 6:17 am PDT
When I watched your story today the thought that kept coming to my mind was OH MY GOD that girl is going to let loose when she gets to college. You are a good mom, but I to once was a under the microsscope daughter who was never aloud to make my own mistakes and nothing was ever good enough so when I got out on my own I went way over board. plus as an adult it took along time not to be a people pleaser cause that was what I was taught to care what others thought all the time which made me a target to get walked all over by people. That didn't teach me I was still an over protective mom afraid to let my kids suffer the way I did then I got custody of my boyfriends daughter at 17 who's mother never let her do anything and I saw how sheltered and un prepared she was to face this world and what a handicap she was going to have. Then when his 20 year old moved in it was even worse she was so Nieve and didn't have a clue about the real world. So I have learned to lighten up and my boys are growing from it. Keep up being a good mom just know you did a good job and she is beautiful but she is her own person and make sure you let her know that you are proud of her no matter what that she doesn't have to please ever;yone all the time..Know you have done a good job and taughter her good values let her put them to use and sit back and see what a good job you have done...And know it's okay if she falls some times she knows you are there to pick her up don't make her afraid to be able to come to you when she has a problem cause she is afraid she'll disapoint you. Trust me you want her to be able to come to you because no matter how involved you are she will incounter a problem in life and let me tell you there's nothing more pleasing as a mother when your child comes to you with a problem because they trust you and know you will stand by;; them and not judge them but help them learn from there mistakes and guide them to advoid it in the future. good luck .. |
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June 1, 2008, 5:47 am PDT
Quote From: tinynedl2 Why doesn't any professional recommend, or at least mention, ABSTINENCE? I've never heard Dr Phil or Dr Masterson mention it. Dr Phil, if you've *ever* promoted abstinence, that was the one day I didn't watch your show, and I'm sorry. You have the attention of the world, and could easily influence millions to step back from the brink of having sex in the wrong times, conditions, places and people. Truly, why don't you occasionally suggest it? And why do you not talk about "secondary virginity"? Millions of teens would be so relieved if they knew they could say "no" late, rather than never. Why not do a show of a panel of teenagers who are virgins? There are millions of them out there, and they are almost voiceless. You have rewarded young people for various things in the past (academics or hard work comes to mind). Virgin teens deserve to be rewarded and encouraged and held up as a good example. And, Dr Phil, why not use your healthy ego to boldly say there's nothing wrong with being a virgin at 40, when Hollywood jeers and mocks it? How about a show that tastefully treats the topic of lewd clothing? Teach parents to forbid their kids from wearing clothes once best suited for prostitution and pornography! Singles and parents wonder why the rape rate is so high, yet they, and/or their daughters, dress in clothes that would make Marilyn Monroe blush. Every night of the week parents allow their kids to go to movies and watch TV shows that push sex, and make fun of those who don't. Talking about sex with kids is very critical and should be done early and often, as today's show made clear. But please, emphasize the fact that they will never have to worry about STDs, including AIDS, and they'll never have to worry about kid/teen pregnancy, and they probably won't have to worry about future sex problems as adults, if they simply apply the "A" word. One problem about that: abstinence on a small scale is not cool, and some kids might lose friends over it. Abstinence on a large scale is not cool either, and the show might lose some viewers. abstinence is a good thing, but logically kids are signing contracts with their parents. and then texting their friends about what a joke it is and i want to loose my vcard to you. you can't assume because you push for it is gonna happen . I have a 14 year old who is dating. the girls parents had her sign that contract made her break up with my son cause all he wanted was in her pants. when she is texting my son about her naked body and her contract my son is telling her he wants to wait that sex messed things up. then he has a friend texting him about getting head. I have always been open about sex with my son and answered any questions. I tell him I'd perfer he waits and explain the why's not just cause I say so but I also tell him that if he makes the descition I'd rather he come to me and I can prepare him properly that be a grandma. he doesn't know I read his texts so i can't freak out about them I just have to start conversations that kind of bring those things up and get my values in there and hope he picks them up. but whether we like it or not they are teens and think they know more than us and they will sneak around to do things ....just food for thought.but if abstince is all you push they will do it just to defy you.if my sons girlfriends parents taught her sex as well as abstence I may not be so shocked in the texts she sends my son. .. |
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