Is there a dating double standard? Absolutely. At age 61, this long-divorced and childless female has seen and heard about it all from men, other women and her own experience. Examples follow:
- the online dating service prospects who've lied about their ages, marital status and incarcerations, much less everything inbetween;
- the married colleagues who've suggested that we work together in my/his room during business trips;
- the men whose eyes dart around the room and then excuse themselves from my side after learning how old I am;
- the younger men looking for a sugar mama, and the much older ones seeking "a nurse with a purse";
- the friends' husbands who've quietly offered their sexual services to relieve my "frustration", or their own boredom with an affair on the side;
- the clergyman who offered to hear my confession and offer his counsel alone in my home after his kids were in bed;
- the fears and unfounded suspicions of women with spouses or SO's who don't invite single/divorced/widowed women to participate in neighborhood couples' social events; and
- the eligible men who've disappeared after being informed that getting tested for STIs and using condoms will be necessary for sexual intimacy. You should hear some of the responses I've gotten as to why these precautions are unnecessary with older women. I swear, the ignorance fairly oozes.
I could go on, but you probably get the idea. The older a decent single woman is, the harder iit is to find an equally decent single man.
I don't go to bars (or drink); hold to preconceived ideas about "suitable" age, occupations or physical appearance; or go out with female friends in a posse: all are notions that don't work. I'm a decent and attractive lady who is comfortable with living on her own, but I still would like to find a good man who really wants to grow old with me. I've just about given up on the idea, but I'm looking forward to Dr. Phil's show on older dating to see what else I can do. Sure, I'm getting up there, but I'm not too old to learn something new.