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Messages By: sukie45

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Touched

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sad
July 25, 2005, 11:40 am CDT

living with chronic pain

I have been living the summer from hell.  I have fibromyalgia and I have lived from one flare to the next since early spring.  My dr. is sympathetic and my husband also understands.  I take every supplement that I read about that is suppose to help. 

I had been working out at the gym five days a week with a mix of using the treadmill, the machines and free weights coupled with aquabics.  I remember one week feeling really up and begining to "feel" my body as a good thing.  the next Monday my knee gave out while on the treadmill.  I found it difficult to use the machines and I kept dropping the free weights.  My dr. told me to lay off the gym until I felt better but my aquabics were ok.  The next week during an aquabics class I found myself fighting to breath and the chest pain was something else.  Back to the dr.  No more aquabics and more medications.

I started on the regeime I use when my fibro kicks in and eight weeks later I am still in pain, still running out of air and my whole leg hurts instead of my knee.  As I said my Fr. is sympathetic but I  feel really wierd going to the office almost every week, especially when I know that there is realatively little can be done for fibro.

I use meditation, playing my keyboard, painting, gardening, and prayer.  I know there are people my age doing wonderful things but not me.  I am depressed.  I am fat.  I am out of shape.  I am out of hope.

Is there anyone else out there like me.  What do you do?  Please don't tell me to look on the bright side or any other  moronically cherrie euphamisms.

By the way this is one of my good days.

 
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Touched

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frustrated
October 21, 2005, 2:19 pm CDT

women's lib

Quote From: mollymay05

Hello all, when did the world decide that women must work outside of the home to have a productive and useful life?  When did a mother lovingly and seriously raising children and keeping a home become not good enough for some men?  I have no problem with a man expecting me to work IF we don't have preschoolers at home and I have no problem staying at home and keeping said house and preschoolers BUT do not ask me to do both if it won't ruin us financially to do so.  Our generation (X-ers) seem to be the worst for any kind of delayed gratification, we want at 25 years old what it took our parents 25 years to accumulate - the big house, two cars, maybe a trip once a year and we're ruining our families to have these things and stuff.  We ignore our children and live our jobs.  I don't want to be that way and will not marry someone who doesn't agree with me on this topic.  I don't remember how many pairs of shoes I had as a child or how many trendy outfits I went through over the years, but I distinctly remember that my mother missed every single play and concert I was in as a child at school, that I remember.  I can't have it all and I don't want it all, women are just getting too darn tired!
As a youndg woman in the 70's I got caught up in the notion put forth by women's lib that a woman must go out into the work place to "find herself".  I did with a vengance.  I worked full time as anurse then went to college and university.  I raised 2 sons, entertained my family and friends.  The year that Haley's comet appeared I fell apart.  It took another ten years but eventually I had a nervous breakdown.  you cannot have it all. it is a lie.  The irony of this is I still ;haven't "found myslef".  whoever I was or am got swallowed in the process.  I gave my family,friends,coworkers,classmates,and patients all I had and wished I had saved some for me.  i am now overweight,(please not weight loss strategies I've done them all, even Dr.Phil's) overtired, overmedicated and over the hill.
 

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