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Messages By: darlaash

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July 24, 2005, 2:27 pm CDT

Family

Please bear with me, as this is very painful to express. 10 years ago, I was raped by my Aunt's husband the night before they were to be married and never said anything. They had a party, everyone was drinking, I passed out and thought I was in a safe place (My aunt's house). When I woke up, he was having his way with me. I grabbed my clothes and ran out. So here I am, all of 31 years of age, now married to a man who refuses to attend those family functions because the rapist would be at the family gathering. Thats understandable, right? But for 7 years, my hubby hasnt came to any family functions, and it has really started to screw with my marriage, starting with the family taking pot shots at my hubby for not coming around (little do they know why!) So on my Dad's b-day, my grandmother kept belittling and berating my marriage and my husband, so I blew up, and the truth came out. The truth would've never came out if my hubby hadn't put his foot down about how he feels about this. Since I put my family in check, they obviously side with the rapist, and now I've lost the family I thought I had. This guy isn't even blood. We were a tight knit Italian family, but where's the love? My mom and dad told me that I should've just kept my mouth shut. What the f--- is that? Someone, anyone, what the hell is going on here? Yes I know I should've spoken up back then, but I love my Aunt so much, I didn't want to speak up and ruin her wedding day!

Bless your heart!! I understand what you went through with your uncle because I was raped by my mothers boyfriend when I was 12 Im now 38 and it still effects me.Your husband had every right to put his foot down that is what a good husband should do.As for your family if they want to take your uncle's side and not your's shame on them.They should be there for you but if that's the way they want to be than let them stay out of your life and be with the one's that will love you and protect you.When they wake up and realize you were violated and treated so unfair and apoligize to you then try to make amends.But until then be happy with the family you do have that loves as it sounds like your husband does.If it was my husband he would have showed my uncle a few things thats probably why your husband didn't want to go to any family functions in fear that he wouldve done something to him and that wouldve just brought more heartache to you.
 

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