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Messages By: utahinbc

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October 31, 2005, 10:39 pm PST

10/31 "Spoiled and Entitled?"

Kids do not need TVs/DVD players in their bedrooms.  What happened to parents encouraging their children to read or play outside?  It makes me wonder if parents who let their kids have TVs in the bedroom can actually read themselves. 

 
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November 11, 2005, 11:59 pm PST

Difficulty Forming Friendships

I'm pretty sure why I have trouble making friends.  I'm extremely shy and people tend to think I'm a snob.  Also, I don't like to express my opinion just to agree with someone else.  My main problem is reaching out and making the first move.  I'm always waiting for the other woman to make the first move.   

  

Plus, I don't have kids, and it's hard for someone who has kids to find something in common with me.   I am divorced, but I don't like to join the bitter complaining about the exes. 

  

Let alone the self esteem issue.   Plus I live in rural Canada, which makes it hard.  I"m not a farm lady, so there's another lack of commonality.  Any advice. 

  

  

  

 
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November 12, 2005, 12:00 am PST

Difficulty Forming Friendships

Quote From: feliss75

Well, I'm 30 years old and in between jobs at the moment, because I moved back "home" from Britain. I sure could exchange email with you. Write and tell me who you are to my e-mail: theroses75@yahoo.se 

  

Looking forward to your e-mail. 

Feliss 

HI Feliss, 

  

Where do you live in Britain?  I lived in Croydon for 6 months.  it was awesome. 

  

Cindy 

 
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November 12, 2005, 12:10 am PST

Hunting Obsessed BF

HI All, 

  

Maybe this isn't the right topic, but I have a question.  Do any of you ladies have a partner/spouse who takes a hobby to the extreme?  Maybe it's just me, but my bf goes hunting 5 times a week for hours at a time.  He says "it's just until deer season is over", but before that there's moose and elk season!  It's all he talks about when he gets home (except the gory details, I made that clear I don't want to hear).  Then it's off to his shed to hang the deer and butcher it.  This is about 2 hours a night for a week.  Then the phone calls from his hunting buddies.  

  

I try to be patient and do my hobbies (needlework) while he's gone, but when he puts a plastic bag of deer meat in the fridge and the juice leaks all over, I went ballistic.  He expected me to clean it up.  It wasn't even his deer, it was his friend's.  I did help out. 

  

What is with men?  He says he wants to spend time with me, but then he asks if it's ok if he goes hunting the next few days.  Why doesn't he just tell the truth that he'd rather be hunting?  I'm sure some of you have experienced the same with golfers. 

  

How do you women deal with it?  I don't mind the time alone..to a point.  5 days a week is a lot.  Then he expects me to decide what to do when he has time.. WE live in a rural town in Canada and there's not a whole lot to do.  If he'd rather be hunting, I'd rather him be there than pretend to be with me. 

  

Sorry for the ranting and raving, 

Cindy 

 
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November 12, 2005, 12:14 am PST

Is 14 too young?

Hi, 

  

I'm not a parent myself, but I have a question for those of you that are.  Do you think 14 is too young to be working at McDonald's?  In Canada it's legal.  I remember having babysitting jobs at that age, but I'm wondering if a 14 yo is old enough to handle the real day to day of working.  It's my friend's daughter.  Any opinions or am I just old fashioned? 

 
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November 12, 2005, 12:19 am PST

birth control/antidepressants

Hi,  

I'm sure this question has been answered before, but here goes:  I heard that birth control(depo) and antidepressants can alter sexual desire.  I am on both.  I have been doing a lot better than some of the other meds I am on, but I am noticing a lack of desire.  My partner is more than willing to satisfy, but I feel like I have to fake an orgasm in order to appease his ego.  He doesn't understand that women (I guess me in particular) don't have an orgasm every time.  He takes it very personal.  Is is wrong for me to do this?  I can't go off the antidepressants at this time.  He insists on the birth control as he doesn't want to wear a condom or get a vasectomy.  He has no interest in having children.  I guess it's a man thing. 

  

any advice? 

 
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November 12, 2005, 12:22 am PST

new to board

Hi, 

 Does anyone have any advice for someone living in rural Canada with depression?  There aren't any support groups that I know of.  It's still a stigma to admit to depression.  I would love to talk to anyone about it. 

 
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November 12, 2005, 12:30 am PST

workplace bullies

I don't know if you want to read another story about a workplace bully, but maybe someone will realize they're not alone. 

  

I worked as an admin asst at a bank a few years ago.  After a few months running the dept. myself, my new boss was introduced to me.  He told me to lose some weight and get some new clothes to better represent himself.  He was a fitness freak.  We worked in an open office of cubicles, and he often yelled (raised his voice) at me so others could here.  I was in tears most of the time, and he told me to "buck up."  The last straw was when he screamed at me (he worked in a glass walled office) from his desk that I was an imbecile and useless.  He didn't even bother to walk to my cube.  The whole office heard and was silent.  After I gathered my courage, I walked into his office and said "If you have something to say to me, you should have the decency to do it in private."  He answered that he had the right to say whatever he wanted to me wherever.  Needless to say, my self esteem was shattered, and I really needed that job.  Luckily I found a job paying much less and quit. 

  

You don't have to take it!! 

 
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November 12, 2005, 12:31 am PST

Workplace Bullies

Quote From: utahinbc

I don't know if you want to read another story about a workplace bully, but maybe someone will realize they're not alone. 

  

I worked as an admin asst at a bank a few years ago.  After a few months running the dept. myself, my new boss was introduced to me.  He told me to lose some weight and get some new clothes to better represent himself.  He was a fitness freak.  We worked in an open office of cubicles, and he often yelled (raised his voice) at me so others could here.  I was in tears most of the time, and he told me to "buck up."  The last straw was when he screamed at me (he worked in a glass walled office) from his desk that I was an imbecile and useless.  He didn't even bother to walk to my cube.  The whole office heard and was silent.  After I gathered my courage, I walked into his office and said "If you have something to say to me, you should have the decency to do it in private."  He answered that he had the right to say whatever he wanted to me wherever.  Needless to say, my self esteem was shattered, and I really needed that job.  Luckily I found a job paying much less and quit. 

  

You don't have to take it!! 

Oh, I forgot to add:  this man went through 6 admin assistants in 6 months.
 
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November 12, 2005, 12:38 am PST

Is this a big deal?

Hi, 

  

I have a question that may seem trivial compared to some of the other posts.  Every Christmas my fiancee spend 15 days with his parents at their home.  I was raised in a home that it is considered rude to impose oneself for that length of time.  Of course, my relatives all lived close to one another.  My fiance's parents live about 8 hours away in a cramped house with 8 people staying there.  Then they invite friends over for drinking every night.  They are from Slovakia, and often converse in Slovak.  I feel left out.  I wouldn't mind staying for even a week, but it gets so long.  They try to get me to go skiing, which I am terrified of.  Then we have to bring our german shepherd, and they have a german shepherd.  I am so homesick, but  I can't go home until my immigration papers are completed in CAnada.  I am a USA citizen. 

  

Am I being too sensitive?  I value my alone time, and it's impossible to get a way to read a book without being "unsociable"  Help! 

 

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