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Messages By: hrinks
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October 2, 2008, 5:02 pm PDT
 Quote From: meemaw2jjmm wow, thank you for hitting the nail on the head! Melissa has read "The Sociopath Next Door" and many other books on this subject, along with talking to a psycologist friend who diagnosed John without even meeting him, just from Melissa's conversations about what John has done to her and their children. The sole reason Melissa wanted to do this show was to get help for the children, which she did not get, but I suspect Dr. Phil recognized what Melissa was dealing with, and decided to let the courts handle everything. These children are so troubled and hurt from what John has said and done to them and Melissa, we just want help so that they can cope and not end up juvenile delinquents. Every time they come back from Johns, we have to undo the hurt and damage he has done to them. But, he puts on a good show in front of his friends, so they think he is father of the year, but, some day the children will be grown and then the truth will be known. Please pray for JohnJohn and Maddie--the trial was postponed until December 22nd! Thank you for your time and concern. http://www.aftermath-surviving-psychopathy.org/ - help for rebuilding after a relationship with a psychopath - they are more common than you think and they avoid treatment & are resistent to treatment
If you have children - here is help for divorce and custody - do your research before divorcing an abuser of any kind because they are incredibly cunning (the more "normal" you came from, the more shocking the experience of dealing with them & how they con others can be - this can occur in public, in counseling, and in court. Do your research. http://groups.msn.com/PSYCHOPATH/linksl211.msnw
Real information on narcissistics - life & sanity saving information for abuse victims http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissistic_personality_disorder
Real information on psycopaths - life & sanity saving information for abuse victims http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychopath
Imagine this . . . . . . their child falls and they do not run over to check on them. That is a life in the absence of empathy. http://predator-awareness.healthylifestylegeek.com/pursuit-of-happiness/
Hare checklist - scroll down - on this page http://www.minddisorders.com/Flu-Inv/Hare-Psychopathy-Checklist.html
SUPPORT GROUP http://thepsychopath.freeforums.org/profile.php?mode=register&agreed=true
Information on the Study of Psychopaths http://www.hare.org/
And prayer lines are really helpful too when dealing with issues like this. If you saw the show I was on which is messageboard #2841, you will understand.
Heather www.myspace.com/heatherinks |
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Also Focus on the Family offer 1 free phone counseling sesson with a Masters level or higher and good referrals but make sure that you still research their education, views, etc with really good questions. We saw about 10 counselors before we did the show and my husband avoided the Phd & really good one (no show). Get the best ones you can find who are good at dealing with psychopaths, probably a psychiatrist. And also make sure that you lawyer is used to it too. I read a recommendation of having the person diagnosed by two seperate specialists before the court case. If you need more links or info, my email is in my profile. |
December 11, 2008, 9:09 pm PST
Quote From: aseagul I am soo upset right now. I'm watching is disbelief at Dr. Phil attacking this woman. He's blaming her for some of her husband's behavior. THIS IS AN INSULT TO ALL WOMEN OUT THERE BEING MENTALLY OR PHYSICALLY ABBUSED! How dare you Dr. Phil for saying that she has to own up to her part in her husband wanting to kill her. These kind of comments is why some women don't come forward for help when they are in those situations. When a woman is being mentally or physically abused, she already blames herself all the time without having someone like Dr. Phil come out and say that it IS. I've been in the same situation as this model and if I had someone tell me on national TV that it was partly my fault that my husband had thoughts of killing me, I never would have gotten out of that situation.
Dr. Phil, I hope someone on your staff reads this because I think that what you did today was absolutely unexceptable. You have 30 yrs experience as you so often remind us, well PLEASE don't blame the person being abused. Today's show you completely sided with the husband and THAT is NOT the action of a professional. She should be given the tools and help to leave that type of environment NOT side with the husband and tell her to change her ways.
Oh my God, I'm watching as I'm typing and you just called her an Abuser!!!! Dr. Phil WHAT are you thinking????? You are NOT helping anyone that might be watching right now and in the same situation. What you are doing is telling all these men that it's OK because it's the woman's fault.
Anyway, I'm so upset right now and I've been a fan of your show for so long but I'm starting to think that you are no longer actually looking to help people. I think you need to step back and think WHY you are on television and WHY you do these types of shows. Because today's show was certainly NOT helping anyone other than your ratings.
I'm seriously going to have to rethink watching your show if this is what you have become.
From someone that has been in this woman's shoes and I refuse to believe that it was MY FAULT I went though it. Thank you. I was shocked too. How did you get through? Please share here or through my profile. |
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December 11, 2008, 9:25 pm PST
If you listen, people cry out for help years before things happen. Girl told CPS of abuse 2 years before stepdad's rampage, documents show By Marjie Lundstrom and Sam Stanton mlundstrom@sacbee.com //$(document).ready(function(){ // $("#bug").dialog("autoOpen","false"); //}); Published: Thursday, Dec. 11, 2008 | Page 11A The 14-year-old girl who survived the slaying of her mother and siblings by her stepfather Dec. 1 had reported him to authorities two years earlier for allegedly beating her with a stick, forcing her to go without food, shaving her head and making her sleep in the garage without blankets, documents from Sacramento County's Child Protective Services show. CPS briefly took the children out of the home in September 2006. Yet it determined that the then-12-year-old's claims were "unfounded" and returned the children to the south Sacramento home of her stepfather, Ying "Chris" Moua, and her mother, Bouavanh "Kim" Moua, internal documents released to The Bee Wednesday indicate. Sacramento sheriff's officials say Ying Moua, 33, went on a rampage Dec. 1 and killed his wife and the couple's 2-year-old twins, and seriously injured their 3-year-old daughter, before he shot himself. The 14-year-old was not harmed because CPS had placed her in protective custody on Nov. 21, after a teacher at her school discovered a journal she had kept for more than a year that described her stepfather's abuse of her. Another sibling, an 8-year-old boy, also escaped harm because he had been living in a different home at the time. The deaths raise new questions about CPS' decision to leave the three siblings in the home after the teenager reported her abuse allegations last month, and for its failure to even go to the home to investigate. Instead, the agency asked sheriff's deputies to inspect the home on Nov. 22, and no further action was taken. "I don't know how many more little coffins the people of Sacramento County have to see before the Board of Supervisors, who run this program, start taking personal responsibility for the number and nature of these crimes," said Ed Howard of Sacramento, senior counsel for the Children's Advocacy Institute. "The accumulated weight of these deaths indicates a deeply rooted, systemic problem" that transcends individual social workers, Howard said. A CPS spokeswoman reiterated Wednesday that the agency cannot comment beyond the required release of the documents because of confidentiality laws. With a few exceptions, the Board of Supervisors has been largely silent about the string of deaths. In August, they signed off on a $100,000 review of CPS' policies and procedures. That audit is under way. Supervisor Roger Dickinson said the board has been, and continues to be, deeply involved in CPS issues. "I don't think there's been any lack of attention or concern," he said. CPS has been under scrutiny for much of this year following a series of deaths of children whose families were known to the agency. A Bee investigation published in June found that the agency still was troubled, despite large funding increases that followed the 1996 death of 3-year-old Adrian Conway. The agency also is the subject of a county grand jury investigation that was sparked by The Bee's revelation that documents in the death of one child this year had been altered. But recalcitrance inside the agency apparently was so great the grand jury took the unusual step of warning all CPS workers and management in October that they must cooperate with the probe, which is ongoing. The documents released Wednesday indicate that CPS was told about three weeks ago about violence in the home, as detailed by the 14-year-old in new abuse claims. Portions of the documents were redacted, but it is clear the girl reported one member of the family "has been thrown onto a wall" by the stepfather. That document, an emergency response sheet that indicates it was compiled the afternoon the girl lodged her allegations, also states that "mom is being hit by the stepfather" and "the stepfather is reported to have anger issues." It notes that "(m)om knows about the abuse and has not interceded," and lists allegations against the stepfather as including "emotional abuse, general neglect, physical abuse." The document also indicates that CPS was aware of the September 2006 abuse report but states those earlier accusations were "unfounded." |
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