I have been dealing with a recent divorce and depression since April. I was getting a good grip on the grieving process and having more good days than bad. I was actually starting to feel like I could survive my divorce and the failure of it all.
Two weeks ago, my soon-to-be ex walked into my home and held me hostage in my home for 4 hours. He had never owned a gun before that day or showed any type of violent behavior towards me. He threatened to kill me and himself. My daughter was asleep and is still unaware that this happened.
He is in custody and jailled right now. The court system has the case and his fate is in their hands now. I realize that he can't hurt me today or tomorrow, but I can't get over what the future holds for me. I don't feel I will ever be safe from him again.
I am to the point of being able to talk about this with close family. I have had friends ask, but I don't feel like talking about it most of the time. I am just numb. I find I would rather be closed up in my house than any where. I feel like if I had a wound, then I should have a reason to feel this way, but I don't show any signs that anything this drastic has happened to me. I am a wreck.
If there is anyone out there that has dealt with anything close to this, please tell me how to get back to normal again. I just want my life again and to find some type of joy in each day. I want to be a good mother to my child. I want to be more than this shell that I am now.
Thank you for any help.
