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My only child is a 32 yr old man and happily married.   I love my daughter-in-law.  She is really a good woman.  These mothers are absolutely over the top.  The last thing I want is the responsibilty of running their lives when I have enough of a job running my own.  I wonder what kind of mother in laws they had.  Perhaps they were treated unfairly too.  My ex mother in law was OK  but I was just as glad to be rid of her as I was her son, but I must say her meddeling was nothing as horrible as these people.  I hesitate to call them mothers because the word mother means comfort, nuturing and caring to me.  I don't see any of that so far here.

 It's hard to keep your mouth shut all the time but it is the best way to live in peace.  Grown children are not stupid and when you let them go it is a sign of a good parent.  We raise them to be independent, make their own decisions and most importantly pay their own way.  How sad to miss out on a grandchild's life.  How evil to even imply an affair with your own son.  What is the gain here?  How could she possibly think that would be acceptable in any way, shape or form?

Once in awhile I will get a visit or a call for advice.  I hesitate to give out too much.  Usually I just help them think things through - Avoid the "you should" phrase and make a few suggestions - then leave it alone.  Nobody wants to be checked on to see if you are doing what someone advised you to do.  These women make Marie Barrone look like Mother Teresa.....

I think the new wife is a trouble maker and it should have been discussed between the Parents and not with her.  That's why there is so much trouble with extended familes.  New spouses can be so vindictive.  Nobody wins here -

to Selina - I am so sorry you have been treated this way.  Dr Phil is right - it's not your fault.

I agree the money support should stop but not the emotional support.