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July 25, 2005, 3:21 pm CDT

Where do we go from here?

About a year ago, my husband had an affair while I was out of town visiting children and grandchildren.  I suspected something was going on and returned home unexpectedly.  I caught him with the other woman. 

Moving on, this other woman is no longer around.  I have forgiven my husband and gotten over the anger for his betrayal.  I have had counseling and been on antidepressants.  I realized what mistakes that I made in our relationship and have worked on changing my hurtful behaviors.  My husband even says that he notices the big changes that I have made.

Two weeks before our anniversary, my husband told me that he wanted a divorce.  A couple of days later, he asked to try again.  This has occurred 3 or 4 times since then.  Most recently, we have separated and my husband cannot say that he wants a divorce; however, he is fearful that he will not be able to forgive himself for what he has done to me and that we cannot recapture the feelings of love and romance that we had before all of this happened.  I have faith that God does mean for us to be together but it is very difficult at times especially since I am the only one who feels this way.  Does anyone have any helpful advice for me?

 

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