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Hi Amanda,

 

My name is Carol and I am a birthmom.  I have been happily reunited with my son for 12 wonderful years.  There has not been a time in his life that I didn't think of him.  Birthdays were especially hard for me.  You see I had my son for 1 1/2 years before I had to surrender him to adoption because I had no one to help me, familial or financially.  What I was making was not enough to sustain the both of us.  On his birthday I would find a place inside of myself and stay there with all my memories and the love I continously felt for him.  My son was born in 1970 in what was called the baby scoop era.  Thousands and thousands of us moms lost our babies through coersion.

Believe me your mom thought of you often.

My son grew up without his father.  We divorced when he was two.  My husband had to pay child support and alimony which he never did.  Although I was angry at him for not supporting his son I never stopped him from seeing him.  He eventually pulled further and further away from his son until he no longer even wanted to see him.  My point is I vowed I would not talk evil of his father because in my mind that's like telling my son that half of him is bad.  When my son grew up and became an adult he asked me about his father and where he was.  I set up the reunion of my son and his father and let my son decide on his own what his opinion was of his father.  I was wise not to say anything because my son said he was a real jerk and that the father (my second husband) he's had for over 21 years was indeed his real dad.