12/18 Family Divided - Part 10
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Posted by: sethlogan
Posted on: 2003-12-18 08:36:48
I think this family is doing great. I really think the are going to make it all the way. I am praying for all of you and you are all such fabulous people.
Posted by: sethlogan
Posted on: 2003-12-18 08:36:48
I think this family is doing great. I really think the are going to make it all the way. I am praying for all of you and you are all such fabulous people.
dont agree 100%
Posted by: legggz
Posted on: 2003-12-19 16:51:20
I do beleive the family is doing better. I do know how the editing of the shows go as well. I do not agree that Erin is as caught up as the rest of the family is. The show was mostly about Erin and breaking down these walls and getting rid of this 'rattlesnake' personality, but at the end of the show when Dr. Phil gave Martin the news about his siblings finally wanting to meet him, who did Martin hug? He hugged the translator... not once but twice. Not once did he turn to his wife (on the show) and look to her for comfort. I saw no emotion from Erin despite her husband weeping next to her. I found it very disheartening that after discussing through the whole show Erin's 'wall' and then the show didnt even finish with a change from the beginning.
Posted by: legggz
Posted on: 2003-12-19 16:51:20
I do beleive the family is doing better. I do know how the editing of the shows go as well. I do not agree that Erin is as caught up as the rest of the family is. The show was mostly about Erin and breaking down these walls and getting rid of this 'rattlesnake' personality, but at the end of the show when Dr. Phil gave Martin the news about his siblings finally wanting to meet him, who did Martin hug? He hugged the translator... not once but twice. Not once did he turn to his wife (on the show) and look to her for comfort. I saw no emotion from Erin despite her husband weeping next to her. I found it very disheartening that after discussing through the whole show Erin's 'wall' and then the show didnt even finish with a change from the beginning.
hugless erin
Posted by: wiggins2
Posted on: 2003-12-19 16:54:15
if i had Erin for a wife I'd hug the translator too!
Posted by: wiggins2
Posted on: 2003-12-19 16:54:15
if i had Erin for a wife I'd hug the translator too!
hugless erin
Posted by: trudrems
Posted on: 2003-12-19 19:22:19
I thought the same. The poor guy was hugging everyone except for his wife. Maybe at least a touch on the arm would have done. Being that Dr. Phil just told her about letting down her walls.
Posted by: trudrems
Posted on: 2003-12-19 19:22:19
I thought the same. The poor guy was hugging everyone except for his wife. Maybe at least a touch on the arm would have done. Being that Dr. Phil just told her about letting down her walls.
Erin
Posted by: brendamc61
Posted on: 2003-12-20 17:38:28
I did notice she had her arm across the back of his chair and her hand on his back at one point. Right after I noticed that, Martin stood up to hug Dr. Phil.
Posted by: brendamc61
Posted on: 2003-12-20 17:38:28
I did notice she had her arm across the back of his chair and her hand on his back at one point. Right after I noticed that, Martin stood up to hug Dr. Phil.
Erin
Posted by: mcgruff106
Posted on: 2003-12-20 20:45:50
This is the first thing I noticed after Dr Phil gave Marty his news. He immediately hugged Dr Phil and then the interpreter. He evidently is not used to his wife's affection and didn't not spontaneously reach to her. What did bother me is that the session today was focused on Erin and this was a prime opportunity for her to reach out to Marty to begin her healing. She needs to put forth the initial effort to show she is committed to recovery. I feel very sorry for her coming from a family that shows no affection. I know it will take time and a conscious effort, but it did blow me away that she didn't use this important breakthrough Dr. Phil related to Marty to embrace her husband.
Posted by: mcgruff106
Posted on: 2003-12-20 20:45:50
This is the first thing I noticed after Dr Phil gave Marty his news. He immediately hugged Dr Phil and then the interpreter. He evidently is not used to his wife's affection and didn't not spontaneously reach to her. What did bother me is that the session today was focused on Erin and this was a prime opportunity for her to reach out to Marty to begin her healing. She needs to put forth the initial effort to show she is committed to recovery. I feel very sorry for her coming from a family that shows no affection. I know it will take time and a conscious effort, but it did blow me away that she didn't use this important breakthrough Dr. Phil related to Marty to embrace her husband.
hold on a minute
Posted by: mwinger
Posted on: 2003-12-24 07:29:56
Come on you guys, give her a break. Did Marty even once turn to her? It's not all Erin...what was she supposed to do...step in between Marty and Dr. Phil, or Marty and the translator in order to hug him? Let's at least be fair...this particular episode was just as much Marty as it was Erin.
Posted by: mwinger
Posted on: 2003-12-24 07:29:56
Come on you guys, give her a break. Did Marty even once turn to her? It's not all Erin...what was she supposed to do...step in between Marty and Dr. Phil, or Marty and the translator in order to hug him? Let's at least be fair...this particular episode was just as much Marty as it was Erin.
hold on a minute
Posted by: momngramma
Posted on: 2004-01-05 14:19:34
I feel the same.I'm not sure Erin wants to forgive completly and make this marriage work. momngramma
Posted by: momngramma
Posted on: 2004-01-05 14:19:34
I feel the same.I'm not sure Erin wants to forgive completly and make this marriage work. momngramma
thank you
Posted by: buchanan02
Posted on: 2004-10-16 15:43:09
That is exactly what I was trying to say. That is a good point she could't just step in between her husband and Dr.Phil or the interpeter that would have been kind of rude. The shows about this family had started about Martin's affairs against Erin, then went to their two daughters and how the family was coping together. So as far as i can see these shows have been equaled out between all four.
Posted by: buchanan02
Posted on: 2004-10-16 15:43:09
That is exactly what I was trying to say. That is a good point she could't just step in between her husband and Dr.Phil or the interpeter that would have been kind of rude. The shows about this family had started about Martin's affairs against Erin, then went to their two daughters and how the family was coping together. So as far as i can see these shows have been equaled out between all four.
HUGLESS ERIN
Posted by: pvandine
Posted on: 2003-12-26 11:40:55
I totally agree with you. After talking with Dr Phil about how she had to start showing affection to others, I would have expected Erin to have gone out of her way to hug her husband. Yes, after Marty hugged Dr Phil and after he hugged the interpreter (and after Marty hugged the complete stranger in the back row if necessary), I would have expected Erin to have hugged her husband. This was the perfect opportunity for her to start showing some emotions.
Posted by: pvandine
Posted on: 2003-12-26 11:40:55
I totally agree with you. After talking with Dr Phil about how she had to start showing affection to others, I would have expected Erin to have gone out of her way to hug her husband. Yes, after Marty hugged Dr Phil and after he hugged the interpreter (and after Marty hugged the complete stranger in the back row if necessary), I would have expected Erin to have hugged her husband. This was the perfect opportunity for her to start showing some emotions.
COLD ERIN
Posted by: skye8983
Posted on: 2003-12-31 02:29:39
I just don't think Erin gets it at all & the youngest daughter seems to be taking after her....YES Marty has admitted to several mistakes but he DOES seem to be trying. The show where he just broke down & cried & she sat there (after the WHOLE chat with DR PHIL)showed me..this woman isn't going to change for ANYONE! She's a very cold "poor me always the victim"type of person & quite frankly........I'm sick of her!
Posted by: skye8983
Posted on: 2003-12-31 02:29:39
I just don't think Erin gets it at all & the youngest daughter seems to be taking after her....YES Marty has admitted to several mistakes but he DOES seem to be trying. The show where he just broke down & cried & she sat there (after the WHOLE chat with DR PHIL)showed me..this woman isn't going to change for ANYONE! She's a very cold "poor me always the victim"type of person & quite frankly........I'm sick of her!
Wake Up People
Posted by: fixin_to
Posted on: 2004-01-03 11:00:24
Obviously most of the readers here have never been continually lied to, cheated on and emotionally abused by a spouse. With all that Erin has endured from that slug she is married to, it is going to take more than one session with Dr. Phil, for her to show affection towards Martin. The man wouldn't recognize the truth if it slapped him in the face, he is convinced that every low life thing he's ever done is justified, and he does truly believe most of his own lies making him the biggest, most manipulative phony that ever took in oxygen.
The very best thing Erin can do for herself and her family is to send him packing, before her girls grow up believing that they should accept such crappy behavior from a partner..
Posted by: fixin_to
Posted on: 2004-01-03 11:00:24
Obviously most of the readers here have never been continually lied to, cheated on and emotionally abused by a spouse. With all that Erin has endured from that slug she is married to, it is going to take more than one session with Dr. Phil, for her to show affection towards Martin. The man wouldn't recognize the truth if it slapped him in the face, he is convinced that every low life thing he's ever done is justified, and he does truly believe most of his own lies making him the biggest, most manipulative phony that ever took in oxygen.
The very best thing Erin can do for herself and her family is to send him packing, before her girls grow up believing that they should accept such crappy behavior from a partner..
Wake Up People
Posted by: pdsherrod
Posted on: 2004-01-15 12:31:14
This guy doesn't have a clue to what he has put Erin or his family through. His ultimate goal has nothing to do with growth and healing/bonding with his family, and everything to do with control. (Divorce being the ultimate loss of control). He will parrot anything and everything he feels he needs to in order to accomplish this goal. His deameanor on the show bespeaks a terrific underlying rage that we, as the audience, get a glimpse of as he defends, rationalizes, and bemoans (poor me) his current situation. Oh yes, I've seen the tears. I'm not buying it for an instant !!
Helful advice from Dr Phil, friends, and members of the audience are either belittled, minimized or outright ignored (untill you've walked in my shoes defense!!?)as being insignificant.
The old adage that "its not what one says, but in one's actions "couldn't apply more than in this situation.
Erin, run for your life. This man has no intention of truly changing. Wheather its a year, five years or ten years down the line, you will eventually find out the truth. And as to the anger alluded to above, eventually, it will pour forth and for your sake and the kids, I hope your not around. A leopard can't hide its spots forever.
Posted by: pdsherrod
Posted on: 2004-01-15 12:31:14
This guy doesn't have a clue to what he has put Erin or his family through. His ultimate goal has nothing to do with growth and healing/bonding with his family, and everything to do with control. (Divorce being the ultimate loss of control). He will parrot anything and everything he feels he needs to in order to accomplish this goal. His deameanor on the show bespeaks a terrific underlying rage that we, as the audience, get a glimpse of as he defends, rationalizes, and bemoans (poor me) his current situation. Oh yes, I've seen the tears. I'm not buying it for an instant !!
Helful advice from Dr Phil, friends, and members of the audience are either belittled, minimized or outright ignored (untill you've walked in my shoes defense!!?)as being insignificant.
The old adage that "its not what one says, but in one's actions "couldn't apply more than in this situation.
Erin, run for your life. This man has no intention of truly changing. Wheather its a year, five years or ten years down the line, you will eventually find out the truth. And as to the anger alluded to above, eventually, it will pour forth and for your sake and the kids, I hope your not around. A leopard can't hide its spots forever.
Posted by: heffas
Posted on: 2003-12-20 21:47:12
Erin`s life is in complete turmoil. I just want to hug her and tell her it will allright. Marty`s pass is slowly coming together hopefully he`ll find his answers in Germany. Our prayers go out to the entire family. From Maine..
i disagree, with previous three comments
Posted by: waviewer82
Posted on: 2004-01-05 20:25:35
I would like to say that you three seem very judgemental to Erin. I did see her comfort Martin, her hand was touching his back during most of the last segment, and I have seen much of this affection from her throughout the shows I have watched. I am proud of the progress I see in Erin, and the whole family. All members look more relaxed.
I too am like Erin in my fear of expressing my emotions to my children, and she has made incredible steps. It is not easy to change your behavior in one day. I think you all don't look very closely, because Erin seems to be making incredible progress and seems to be the leader in this family, I mean in the emotional growth area.
I hope that Katherine now feels like the future of her family may be where she wants to be, because it looks as if things are getting so much better.
Marty seems to tearing down his "walls" also, hopefully he isn't still having the "Camera Martin" and the "Off-Camera Martin"
I am sure by the end of the year that Dr. Phil is covering this family they will be happier and more functional that they all could have ever imagined, because they are all growing so much. I am proud of their progess.....:)
Posted by: waviewer82
Posted on: 2004-01-05 20:25:35
I would like to say that you three seem very judgemental to Erin. I did see her comfort Martin, her hand was touching his back during most of the last segment, and I have seen much of this affection from her throughout the shows I have watched. I am proud of the progress I see in Erin, and the whole family. All members look more relaxed.
I too am like Erin in my fear of expressing my emotions to my children, and she has made incredible steps. It is not easy to change your behavior in one day. I think you all don't look very closely, because Erin seems to be making incredible progress and seems to be the leader in this family, I mean in the emotional growth area.
I hope that Katherine now feels like the future of her family may be where she wants to be, because it looks as if things are getting so much better.
Marty seems to tearing down his "walls" also, hopefully he isn't still having the "Camera Martin" and the "Off-Camera Martin"
I am sure by the end of the year that Dr. Phil is covering this family they will be happier and more functional that they all could have ever imagined, because they are all growing so much. I am proud of their progess.....:)
2 wiggins2:
Posted by: lyndish
Posted on: 2003-12-21 20:06:56
HugFULL Marty = HugLESS Erin.
Marty's done his share of hugging OTHER women, hasn't he? If Erin is hugless, it's not HER you should be looking at, is it?!
Posted by: lyndish
Posted on: 2003-12-21 20:06:56
HugFULL Marty = HugLESS Erin.
Marty's done his share of hugging OTHER women, hasn't he? If Erin is hugless, it's not HER you should be looking at, is it?!
Misunderstood Erin
Posted by: nansih
Posted on: 2003-12-27 11:59:47
My first impression of Erin has lasted. The very first time I saw her, I thought, "This is a dynamite lady. She's been trampled on and abused, but she's rising above it." Martin, if you're reading this, Erin is worth fighting for. She is the best thing that ever happened to you. Be patient. Earn her trust, and please, treasure her? She's a diamond. Really.
Posted by: nansih
Posted on: 2003-12-27 11:59:47
My first impression of Erin has lasted. The very first time I saw her, I thought, "This is a dynamite lady. She's been trampled on and abused, but she's rising above it." Martin, if you're reading this, Erin is worth fighting for. She is the best thing that ever happened to you. Be patient. Earn her trust, and please, treasure her? She's a diamond. Really.
Posted by: tmooren
Posted on: 2004-01-15 09:53:55
This is for the person who wrote that if they had Erin for a wife they would hug the translator too. I think that is a little harsh. Erin just got done with an emotional encounter with her sister and once again baby Marty gets the big surprise. I feel Marty is a child and Erin is the only adult in this marriage.
Hugless Erin
Posted by: buchanan02
Posted on: 2004-10-16 15:42:37
I can basically understand why Martin didn't hug his wife myself. After all they have been through it is kind of hard to show emotions. I mean Martin did have a couple affairs on his wife.Have you ever stopped to think that maybe he just didn't want to be close to her at that time because of the way she feels about him right now. I know from experience how it feels to have someone do you wrong like that and then not want to be close to them. They are both hurting and it will take time to mend the hurt and broken hearts.
Posted by: buchanan02
Posted on: 2004-10-16 15:42:37
I can basically understand why Martin didn't hug his wife myself. After all they have been through it is kind of hard to show emotions. I mean Martin did have a couple affairs on his wife.Have you ever stopped to think that maybe he just didn't want to be close to her at that time because of the way she feels about him right now. I know from experience how it feels to have someone do you wrong like that and then not want to be close to them. They are both hurting and it will take time to mend the hurt and broken hearts.
Erin & Martin
Posted by: bonniemal
Posted on: 2003-12-19 19:52:02
Lighten up and cut the woman some slack, poor Martin as you call him has cheated on his wife repeatedly and you wonder why she is not all huggy kissy. She has spent her life protecting her feelings because the people who should have protected her did quite the opposite including poor Martin. Don't get me wrong I like the guy. But after having spent her life being guarded and contained it is going to take a great deal longer than one hour for her to "Melt down".
Posted by: bonniemal
Posted on: 2003-12-19 19:52:02
Lighten up and cut the woman some slack, poor Martin as you call him has cheated on his wife repeatedly and you wonder why she is not all huggy kissy. She has spent her life protecting her feelings because the people who should have protected her did quite the opposite including poor Martin. Don't get me wrong I like the guy. But after having spent her life being guarded and contained it is going to take a great deal longer than one hour for her to "Melt down".
