06/27 How To Talk to Your Kids About...
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Posted by: jacobs4
Posted on: 2003-01-07 14:48:28
my 5 year old asked how his baby sister got in my belly, I didn't know how to answer him so I changed the subject, the problem is, he keeps asking, He is very smart, i just don't know how to answer it. Can you please help me?
Posted by: jacobs4
Posted on: 2003-01-07 14:48:28
my 5 year old asked how his baby sister got in my belly, I didn't know how to answer him so I changed the subject, the problem is, he keeps asking, He is very smart, i just don't know how to answer it. Can you please help me?
re: Birds and Bees
Posted by: sriseden
Posted on: 2003-01-07 15:18:44
Tell your son that women have eggs inside their bodies that can travel down into their womb (or uterus) and grow into a baby.
You may be able to find pictures online
of the development of a baby inside the womb
to show him, talk about what stage his
baby sister is in now, or show him sonograms, ect. This should explain it well
enough for him to be satisfied, as well as getting him thinking in a different direction so you can avoid the part about the sperm and the sex for now.
I told my 5 year old daughter about eggs and
wombs when she asked me how her baby cousin
got in my sisters belly, then got out her
sonograms, cards from the hospital when she
was born, and the piece of tape my doctor
had used to measure my belly and mark off how
much it had grown while I was pregnant with
her- all that stuff took her mind off how the baby actually got there and got her thinking about something else. She is
now 6 1/2 and has never asked for me to explain it any further...yet :)
Hope that helps!
Posted by: sriseden
Posted on: 2003-01-07 15:18:44
Tell your son that women have eggs inside their bodies that can travel down into their womb (or uterus) and grow into a baby.
You may be able to find pictures online
of the development of a baby inside the womb
to show him, talk about what stage his
baby sister is in now, or show him sonograms, ect. This should explain it well
enough for him to be satisfied, as well as getting him thinking in a different direction so you can avoid the part about the sperm and the sex for now.
I told my 5 year old daughter about eggs and
wombs when she asked me how her baby cousin
got in my sisters belly, then got out her
sonograms, cards from the hospital when she
was born, and the piece of tape my doctor
had used to measure my belly and mark off how
much it had grown while I was pregnant with
her- all that stuff took her mind off how the baby actually got there and got her thinking about something else. She is
now 6 1/2 and has never asked for me to explain it any further...yet :)
Hope that helps!
Answering tough questions
Posted by: anet65
Posted on: 2003-01-07 16:11:09
Try taking some time to find out what his question really is. Kids are not able to articulate the same way adults can and can be asking for something totally different than what we think. The younger the child the more basic his/her question is and the answer should be at the same level. He may be thinking that his baby sister was in your real stomach and thought that you had "swallowed" her - which can be a scary idea for him. He may just want to know that Mom's have a special place in their bodies for babies to grow in. Or you can say that the baby's Mom and Dad had started her in Mom's growing place (whatever you want to call it) until she was big enough to come out. More questions - answer what you feel that you can and say that you will explain more as he gets older because it is hard to make it easy for him to understand.
A 5 year old's attention span to answers will be pretty short. So you don't need to go into details but you do need to take advantage of his being comfortable talking to you. When he is in his early teens he will most probably not be willing to ask you questions unless you have built a relationship with him now.
Good Luck!
Posted by: anet65
Posted on: 2003-01-07 16:11:09
Try taking some time to find out what his question really is. Kids are not able to articulate the same way adults can and can be asking for something totally different than what we think. The younger the child the more basic his/her question is and the answer should be at the same level. He may be thinking that his baby sister was in your real stomach and thought that you had "swallowed" her - which can be a scary idea for him. He may just want to know that Mom's have a special place in their bodies for babies to grow in. Or you can say that the baby's Mom and Dad had started her in Mom's growing place (whatever you want to call it) until she was big enough to come out. More questions - answer what you feel that you can and say that you will explain more as he gets older because it is hard to make it easy for him to understand.
A 5 year old's attention span to answers will be pretty short. So you don't need to go into details but you do need to take advantage of his being comfortable talking to you. When he is in his early teens he will most probably not be willing to ask you questions unless you have built a relationship with him now.
Good Luck!
birds and bees
Posted by: tzyz
Posted on: 2003-01-07 16:34:48
Go to your local library and get an age appropriate book. It helped me when my daughter was seven and wanted to know exactly what sex was and how babies are made. There are many books out there that will help explain these things to our kids.
Posted by: tzyz
Posted on: 2003-01-07 16:34:48
Go to your local library and get an age appropriate book. It helped me when my daughter was seven and wanted to know exactly what sex was and how babies are made. There are many books out there that will help explain these things to our kids.
"Teach...young minds the Truth"
Posted by: baron1
Posted on: 2003-01-08 13:54:50
"Happy New Year", tzyz,
Yes, I believe, you need to teach & educate children's young minds...who are so curious to really, know whats going on...about are bodies & Life growing up too!
I did the similar things like...you too! We as parents...will know, the right time, and the children will express there feeling's... to us as well!
Good Luck to all! :)
baron2/Ca :)
Posted by: baron1
Posted on: 2003-01-08 13:54:50
"Happy New Year", tzyz,
Yes, I believe, you need to teach & educate children's young minds...who are so curious to really, know whats going on...about are bodies & Life growing up too!
I did the similar things like...you too! We as parents...will know, the right time, and the children will express there feeling's... to us as well!
Good Luck to all! :)
baron2/Ca :)
Birds and Bees
Posted by: totzmom
Posted on: 2003-01-07 18:10:59
Hi there! I'm sure there are many who will disagree with me, but I told my daughter about the birds and the bees before she started school because that's how I found out. I wanted her to hear it from me and I wanted her to see that I was comfortable with talking about it. When I asked my mom about sex she started to cry. It took me many years to get comfortable with my own sexuality and I don't want to pass that on. (Nor am I going to go all the way to the other end of the scale either) I just gave her some simple facts and encouraged questions. At seven now, she comes to me fairly often to seek more specifics. You have to do what's right for you and your family. I knew my daughter could handle it. Do I wish I could have waited to tell her? Absolutely! But the reality is, they are hearing things earlier and earlier to spite our best efforts. Sexuality is a normal part of who we are and we have to be comfortable with our own sexuality if we want to be good role models. I stress the normal feelings along with the values (marriage, love etc) right along with it.
Posted by: totzmom
Posted on: 2003-01-07 18:10:59
Hi there! I'm sure there are many who will disagree with me, but I told my daughter about the birds and the bees before she started school because that's how I found out. I wanted her to hear it from me and I wanted her to see that I was comfortable with talking about it. When I asked my mom about sex she started to cry. It took me many years to get comfortable with my own sexuality and I don't want to pass that on. (Nor am I going to go all the way to the other end of the scale either) I just gave her some simple facts and encouraged questions. At seven now, she comes to me fairly often to seek more specifics. You have to do what's right for you and your family. I knew my daughter could handle it. Do I wish I could have waited to tell her? Absolutely! But the reality is, they are hearing things earlier and earlier to spite our best efforts. Sexuality is a normal part of who we are and we have to be comfortable with our own sexuality if we want to be good role models. I stress the normal feelings along with the values (marriage, love etc) right along with it.
re: birds and bees
Posted by: sriseden
Posted on: 2003-01-09 13:34:13
There are also many people who will agree with you, and I am one of them.
You are right, our children learn things at a much younger age than we did, and it is better for them to learn important things like this from US and not from other children.
Posted by: sriseden
Posted on: 2003-01-09 13:34:13
There are also many people who will agree with you, and I am one of them.
You are right, our children learn things at a much younger age than we did, and it is better for them to learn important things like this from US and not from other children.
Telling them young
Posted by: moomoogal
Posted on: 2003-01-10 09:26:53
I totally agree with you! I think it is also important to teach proper anatomical names. Using words like pee-pee for penis teaches kids that body parts are cutesy. No one gives dumb little names for arm or leg or brain, so why do we do it for reproductive parts?
Posted by: moomoogal
Posted on: 2003-01-10 09:26:53
I totally agree with you! I think it is also important to teach proper anatomical names. Using words like pee-pee for penis teaches kids that body parts are cutesy. No one gives dumb little names for arm or leg or brain, so why do we do it for reproductive parts?
To: totzmom
Posted by: janilynn
Posted on: 2003-01-11 16:02:30
totzmom I agree with you also. I believe it is up to the parents first, to teach children about sex. Some say when is the right time to do. My answer: before the world does. If you, the parent, will not tell them, the world will. Either by 'soap operas' and other TV shows and movies. Where they will be taught sex the most is at school and it is not in the class room by the teachers. It will be by their peers by actually having sex. And if you do not believe kids are having sex at the tender age of 10-yrs old or even younger then you are fooling yourself and putting your children in jeopardy. Times are very different for the children of today than it was for us, or even our parents and grandparents. So teach your kids before some else does.
janilynn--scusa_mi_pare@yahoo.com
Posted by: janilynn
Posted on: 2003-01-11 16:02:30
totzmom I agree with you also. I believe it is up to the parents first, to teach children about sex. Some say when is the right time to do. My answer: before the world does. If you, the parent, will not tell them, the world will. Either by 'soap operas' and other TV shows and movies. Where they will be taught sex the most is at school and it is not in the class room by the teachers. It will be by their peers by actually having sex. And if you do not believe kids are having sex at the tender age of 10-yrs old or even younger then you are fooling yourself and putting your children in jeopardy. Times are very different for the children of today than it was for us, or even our parents and grandparents. So teach your kids before some else does.
janilynn--scusa_mi_pare@yahoo.com
I Agree!
Posted by: pindy66
Posted on: 2003-11-18 23:12:37
hi. i couldn't agree with you more...kids learn way too many (wrong) things way too early these days. i want and need to have the conversation with my five year old daughter. i just can find the words and don't know where to start and where to stop. any advice?
Posted by: pindy66
Posted on: 2003-11-18 23:12:37
hi. i couldn't agree with you more...kids learn way too many (wrong) things way too early these days. i want and need to have the conversation with my five year old daughter. i just can find the words and don't know where to start and where to stop. any advice?
Posted by: bermis
Posted on: 2003-01-07 19:54:20
When my daughter was about 5, my sister was pregnant and having twins. We talked about how my sister was getting bigger because the babies growing inside of her were getting bigger. She wanted to know how we got twins. I simply drew a circle and then split it in two and continued the joined circles down to where they were two separate circles. She understood and never asked me any more.
Posted by: mhuber
Posted on: 2003-01-07 21:13:28
I don't mean to be rude, BUT telling a 5 year old that his baby sister came from an egg is just gross. Where do eggs come from anyway? Chickens! And we eat them. Anyways I don't think you need to go into details but being honest about it may help. My 10 yr. old knows too much in my mind. But she also talks "with" me about it and doesn't just assume that all the kids at school know everything.
I don't think you are rude, but not quite correct
Posted by: patsy_gal
Posted on: 2003-01-08 01:40:44
Hi, The truth is that a baby does come from an egg that has been fertilized by sperm. I think you probably weren't thinking that you need to explian various eggs. After all, Chicken eggs grown into chickens, and both are food products. There just needs to be an explanation that it is a small egg inside the mommy and I think that a 5-year old would be satisfied with that. If not, then the next logical step would be to explain that it is fertilized by the daddy no matter whether it it is a daddy animanl, bird, etc., with no further explanation. Kids don't seem to want to know lots of details when they are that young. Patsy
Posted by: patsy_gal
Posted on: 2003-01-08 01:40:44
Hi, The truth is that a baby does come from an egg that has been fertilized by sperm. I think you probably weren't thinking that you need to explian various eggs. After all, Chicken eggs grown into chickens, and both are food products. There just needs to be an explanation that it is a small egg inside the mommy and I think that a 5-year old would be satisfied with that. If not, then the next logical step would be to explain that it is fertilized by the daddy no matter whether it it is a daddy animanl, bird, etc., with no further explanation. Kids don't seem to want to know lots of details when they are that young. Patsy
Patsy
Posted by: mhuber
Posted on: 2003-03-03 21:25:26
Thank you Patsy. I do agree with you. I just figure that kids really don't care about eggs now days. I mean my partents tried that one on me and that was 20 years ago? Times change, so should we!
Posted by: mhuber
Posted on: 2003-03-03 21:25:26
Thank you Patsy. I do agree with you. I just figure that kids really don't care about eggs now days. I mean my partents tried that one on me and that was 20 years ago? Times change, so should we!
Re; Birds and Bees
Posted by: _toni_
Posted on: 2003-01-17 07:26:54
I found myself posed with the same question from my four year old daughter while I was pregnant with my second child.
I just told her that Mummy and Daddy had decided to have another baby and that it had to grow in my tummy untill it was big enough to come out.
It was a simple answer suitable for a four year old but she felt that her question had been answered.
I think it's important to tell children the truth and not tell them such tales as 'the baby fairy' or 'the stork' but it has to be on a 'need to know' basis.
For example; I don't think that a four or five year old needs to know about 'eggs and sperm'.
You just have to simplify things for them, tell the truth but only a snippet of it.
As they get older they will start to want a little more information so give them a little more.
A couple of years later when my daughter was six years old she asked if boy's could grow babies in their tummy's too so I told her that only woman have a special growing place called a 'womb' inside their tummy.
Good luck and don't worry,it's not as daunting as it seems.
Posted by: _toni_
Posted on: 2003-01-17 07:26:54
I found myself posed with the same question from my four year old daughter while I was pregnant with my second child.
I just told her that Mummy and Daddy had decided to have another baby and that it had to grow in my tummy untill it was big enough to come out.
It was a simple answer suitable for a four year old but she felt that her question had been answered.
I think it's important to tell children the truth and not tell them such tales as 'the baby fairy' or 'the stork' but it has to be on a 'need to know' basis.
For example; I don't think that a four or five year old needs to know about 'eggs and sperm'.
You just have to simplify things for them, tell the truth but only a snippet of it.
As they get older they will start to want a little more information so give them a little more.
A couple of years later when my daughter was six years old she asked if boy's could grow babies in their tummy's too so I told her that only woman have a special growing place called a 'womb' inside their tummy.
Good luck and don't worry,it's not as daunting as it seems.
re:birds & bees
Posted by: mrssophia
Posted on: 2003-04-04 19:05:17
When I was pregnant with my second child I was very concerned with how to explain it to my son who was not even 2 at the time.. I found a book called "Look How a Baby Grows" it's a poke & look, learning book. Ask for it at Barnes & Nobles or any popular bookstore near you.. Its not only fun for you to read with your child but explains it all in a childs perspective..
Hope this helps!! :-) Good Luck with the new baby!!
Posted by: mrssophia
Posted on: 2003-04-04 19:05:17
When I was pregnant with my second child I was very concerned with how to explain it to my son who was not even 2 at the time.. I found a book called "Look How a Baby Grows" it's a poke & look, learning book. Ask for it at Barnes & Nobles or any popular bookstore near you.. Its not only fun for you to read with your child but explains it all in a childs perspective..
Hope this helps!! :-) Good Luck with the new baby!!
Posted by: leelee29
Posted on: 2003-06-25 18:35:02
My 3 year old daughter was very interested in how her baby sister got into mommy's belly and how was she going to get out. I really didn't know what to tell her, but she would watch a baby story with me and it helped to explain it to her. It is a great show. It doesn't go into major details, but it helped alot in teaching her. I would suggest that you take alook at the show.
Dont wait
Posted by: kosarmydog
Posted on: 2003-06-27 15:40:28
Dont wait until your kids ask about the birds and the bee's.....tell them at a young age to avoid embarassment...kids sense that, then they think it's a silly thing...be honest up front around the age of 5, and you being the parent should bring it up..
Posted by: kosarmydog
Posted on: 2003-06-27 15:40:28
Dont wait until your kids ask about the birds and the bee's.....tell them at a young age to avoid embarassment...kids sense that, then they think it's a silly thing...be honest up front around the age of 5, and you being the parent should bring it up..
Birds and Bees
Posted by: pegldd
Posted on: 2003-06-27 17:32:02
This was a very cute show. However I thought you really put it back to the parents to answer afterall. Maybe you could not be specific on TV.
Your answer to the mother with the cancer was very good and would be a big help to her in answering a child as young as he is. I worked in an agency with cancer patients for ten years and this could be a big problem in knowing how to handle little ones who are really still too young to understand.
Posted by: pegldd
Posted on: 2003-06-27 17:32:02
This was a very cute show. However I thought you really put it back to the parents to answer afterall. Maybe you could not be specific on TV.
Your answer to the mother with the cancer was very good and would be a big help to her in answering a child as young as he is. I worked in an agency with cancer patients for ten years and this could be a big problem in knowing how to handle little ones who are really still too young to understand.
just a suggestion
Posted by: jeaches
Posted on: 2003-06-28 01:10:15
If you are at all religious you can tell you child that when mommies and daddies love each other and they really want a baby God puts a baby in mommmy's tummy to grow and that the doctor helps the baby come out so that everyone can enjoy a new baby.
Posted by: jeaches
Posted on: 2003-06-28 01:10:15
If you are at all religious you can tell you child that when mommies and daddies love each other and they really want a baby God puts a baby in mommmy's tummy to grow and that the doctor helps the baby come out so that everyone can enjoy a new baby.
