07/28 Relationship Rescue Retreat: Part 2
1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9Immature, childish behaviour....
Posted by: sunaqua
Posted on: 2004-05-04 08:04:46
For some reason I really don't care what happens to these 6 couples and their marriage due to their so very childish behaviour. To be spitting, hitting, calling names, having affairs, throwing things justs shows how degrading they are being to each other. You wouldn't even treat your friend like that so why would you do that to the person you proclaimed to love and cherish until death ? Personally I don't see how spending 2 days locked up will help their marriages, it seems they are all doomed and just do not "get" what marriage is all about. My hearts especially aches for their children to have to live with these people. The audacity these couples had to have even created children when they themselves haven't learned how to be adults. None of them deserves to be called "parents" and all of them should have their children taken away until they (the couples) "grow up".
Posted by: sunaqua
Posted on: 2004-05-04 08:04:46
For some reason I really don't care what happens to these 6 couples and their marriage due to their so very childish behaviour. To be spitting, hitting, calling names, having affairs, throwing things justs shows how degrading they are being to each other. You wouldn't even treat your friend like that so why would you do that to the person you proclaimed to love and cherish until death ? Personally I don't see how spending 2 days locked up will help their marriages, it seems they are all doomed and just do not "get" what marriage is all about. My hearts especially aches for their children to have to live with these people. The audacity these couples had to have even created children when they themselves haven't learned how to be adults. None of them deserves to be called "parents" and all of them should have their children taken away until they (the couples) "grow up".
Taking the children away...
Posted by: pitrewerne
Posted on: 2004-05-04 09:15:24
You are right about that statement except that this behaviour can be seen in most marriages at one time or another... In my opinion, what Dr. Phil is showing us is ways to avoid this type of situation and learn from it. I have yet to see a Dr. Phil that doesn't give us a good lesson about relationships. As for me, I won't be missing one show...
Posted by: pitrewerne
Posted on: 2004-05-04 09:15:24
You are right about that statement except that this behaviour can be seen in most marriages at one time or another... In my opinion, what Dr. Phil is showing us is ways to avoid this type of situation and learn from it. I have yet to see a Dr. Phil that doesn't give us a good lesson about relationships. As for me, I won't be missing one show...
Be Part of the Solution
Posted by: coopjake
Posted on: 2004-05-04 13:06:37
I agree with you that taking these couples' children away would solve nothing. It's better to give these people, as well as the rest of us, the tools we need to communicate in a more productive manner.
I also agree that these are extreme examples, but I do see some of myself in a few of them. Oh, not to the extent that my husband and I have physically attacked each other or even faught to this degree, but there are "right-figher" qualities in some arguments. It's like you get so caught up in being right that you forget what the heck you are really mad about. I certainly will start thinking about this for the future.
Thanks again Dr. Phil for being a part of the solution rather than just exposing the problem.
Posted by: coopjake
Posted on: 2004-05-04 13:06:37
I agree with you that taking these couples' children away would solve nothing. It's better to give these people, as well as the rest of us, the tools we need to communicate in a more productive manner.
I also agree that these are extreme examples, but I do see some of myself in a few of them. Oh, not to the extent that my husband and I have physically attacked each other or even faught to this degree, but there are "right-figher" qualities in some arguments. It's like you get so caught up in being right that you forget what the heck you are really mad about. I certainly will start thinking about this for the future.
Thanks again Dr. Phil for being a part of the solution rather than just exposing the problem.
Been there
Posted by: dhomes
Posted on: 2004-05-04 13:36:56
I hate to admit it, but I have been in a marriage like these. I also hate that those of you who haven't been (including Dr. Phil) can't see that it may be more than being stupid, immature, self indulgent, and so on. If you haven't been in a marriage that maybe started off on the wrong foot (gotten married for the wrong reason, haven't ever really bonded, developed the lasting love or trust) then you can't imagine the immensity of the feelings of anger, pain, and frustration that can occur when the animosity gets as bad as it has for these couples. I actually had a husband that refered to us as advisaries; we were at war.
I experienced all of what they are talking about, and much of it had to do with me (the yeller/screamer/name caller) but much of it had to do with him (the dishonest needs avoider, manipulater, and ultimately, adulterous sex addict). In my case, during the marriage I got a lot of self growth help, and in the end chose to respect myself enough to leave (and model that self respect to my children), and as bad as divorce is for children, a situation like that is ten or twenty times worse, and it's my entire goal now to create a healthy family/environment, to learn my lessons and go on. I hope you all can watch this show from a perspective not of "man, those people are..." but wow, I'm really lucky to have the great marriage (husband/wife) I have. As for the participants, if they are there with the honest desire to change and save their marriage, I'm sure it can be done, and Dr. Phil is just the person to do it.
Posted by: dhomes
Posted on: 2004-05-04 13:36:56
I hate to admit it, but I have been in a marriage like these. I also hate that those of you who haven't been (including Dr. Phil) can't see that it may be more than being stupid, immature, self indulgent, and so on. If you haven't been in a marriage that maybe started off on the wrong foot (gotten married for the wrong reason, haven't ever really bonded, developed the lasting love or trust) then you can't imagine the immensity of the feelings of anger, pain, and frustration that can occur when the animosity gets as bad as it has for these couples. I actually had a husband that refered to us as advisaries; we were at war.
I experienced all of what they are talking about, and much of it had to do with me (the yeller/screamer/name caller) but much of it had to do with him (the dishonest needs avoider, manipulater, and ultimately, adulterous sex addict). In my case, during the marriage I got a lot of self growth help, and in the end chose to respect myself enough to leave (and model that self respect to my children), and as bad as divorce is for children, a situation like that is ten or twenty times worse, and it's my entire goal now to create a healthy family/environment, to learn my lessons and go on. I hope you all can watch this show from a perspective not of "man, those people are..." but wow, I'm really lucky to have the great marriage (husband/wife) I have. As for the participants, if they are there with the honest desire to change and save their marriage, I'm sure it can be done, and Dr. Phil is just the person to do it.
I agree
Posted by: try2findme
Posted on: 2004-05-12 11:47:01
You are so right. I was there too. I had a husband that put me down mentally, emotionally and physically(to the floor or across the room and down the wall) I finally, with the help of Dr. Phil and friends I got out. Now I am in a great marriage and when I see those people on the show I thank God I found the right man. I hope all of them the best and if anybody can help them save their marriage it will be Dr. Phil!
Posted by: try2findme
Posted on: 2004-05-12 11:47:01
You are so right. I was there too. I had a husband that put me down mentally, emotionally and physically(to the floor or across the room and down the wall) I finally, with the help of Dr. Phil and friends I got out. Now I am in a great marriage and when I see those people on the show I thank God I found the right man. I hope all of them the best and if anybody can help them save their marriage it will be Dr. Phil!
thank you
Posted by: cathey1963
Posted on: 2004-05-12 14:03:58
I am curently in one of these relationships. I need Doctor Phil because we both want the relationship to work and we have no children together. He has a 9 year old that lives with his mother and it is killing him. Especially when the mother tells the child that he can no longer talk to me. It does not matter if the child is in the home or not it affects children who have become bonded. My husband is an alcoholic and even though he has not drank in one year other than a few miss happs. He still is in deniel about how he acts to me. He doesnt seem to understand the hurt he has casued me. I can cry, straight out tell him, scream, throw tantrums, it doesn't matter he still can not see , feel or hear my pain. when I tell him, in return he tells me his feelings and I haven't been able to deal with mine before now I am asked to deal with his. It is like some compition. Currently we are seperated, I threw him out because my health has had an impact with all the fighting. Now he is holding that against me. Dr. Phil I need your help. I see good in him he don't see and all of this has now changed me. I agree I am mean, ugly and hurtful. He can't (wont take the time to even look at your web page) He wants me to move to another state with him and I am afraid it wont help. What do I do?
Posted by: cathey1963
Posted on: 2004-05-12 14:03:58
I am curently in one of these relationships. I need Doctor Phil because we both want the relationship to work and we have no children together. He has a 9 year old that lives with his mother and it is killing him. Especially when the mother tells the child that he can no longer talk to me. It does not matter if the child is in the home or not it affects children who have become bonded. My husband is an alcoholic and even though he has not drank in one year other than a few miss happs. He still is in deniel about how he acts to me. He doesnt seem to understand the hurt he has casued me. I can cry, straight out tell him, scream, throw tantrums, it doesn't matter he still can not see , feel or hear my pain. when I tell him, in return he tells me his feelings and I haven't been able to deal with mine before now I am asked to deal with his. It is like some compition. Currently we are seperated, I threw him out because my health has had an impact with all the fighting. Now he is holding that against me. Dr. Phil I need your help. I see good in him he don't see and all of this has now changed me. I agree I am mean, ugly and hurtful. He can't (wont take the time to even look at your web page) He wants me to move to another state with him and I am afraid it wont help. What do I do?
help
Posted by: tigerz
Posted on: 2004-07-29 08:31:04
first yer husband must see the problem he has before even concidering a move,you cant run away from the problem,it will always follow you,need to face it head on. i see yer cry for help,screaming,havin tantrums,that is only hurting yerself,you can not down yerself for doing what you feel is the right thing for you. if yer husband wont hear you now,what makes you or him think he will hear you if you move ??..both need to sit down,write a list of ten things you both like about each other,and ten things that you dislike about each other,and take the list and see a counselor,if ya really want to try and make it work,if one of you doesnt,then the answer will be right in front of you of what to do.. good luck
Posted by: tigerz
Posted on: 2004-07-29 08:31:04
first yer husband must see the problem he has before even concidering a move,you cant run away from the problem,it will always follow you,need to face it head on. i see yer cry for help,screaming,havin tantrums,that is only hurting yerself,you can not down yerself for doing what you feel is the right thing for you. if yer husband wont hear you now,what makes you or him think he will hear you if you move ??..both need to sit down,write a list of ten things you both like about each other,and ten things that you dislike about each other,and take the list and see a counselor,if ya really want to try and make it work,if one of you doesnt,then the answer will be right in front of you of what to do.. good luck
help yourself
Posted by: monicarow
Posted on: 2004-07-30 09:15:44
I am sorry to hear about the situation you are in. I have never been on this before but after reading your message I felt I wanted to e-mail you. I have lived with alcholics most of my life although my husband is not my father and brother both are. The are both sober now and have been for years but just becasue some one stops drinking does not mean that they will all the sudden become a wonderful person. There are a lot of other issues beside just drinking involved. My advice to you would be to get yourself to an Alanon group. There are many I am sure in your area and if the first one does not work for you try another. They are all different. My Mother has been going for years and she credits it with keeping her grounded and not worrying so much about the other person. Whether your husband drinks again or not is not the issue you need to get yourself well and Alanon can help you with that. Good luck and remember to take care of yourself.
Posted by: monicarow
Posted on: 2004-07-30 09:15:44
I am sorry to hear about the situation you are in. I have never been on this before but after reading your message I felt I wanted to e-mail you. I have lived with alcholics most of my life although my husband is not my father and brother both are. The are both sober now and have been for years but just becasue some one stops drinking does not mean that they will all the sudden become a wonderful person. There are a lot of other issues beside just drinking involved. My advice to you would be to get yourself to an Alanon group. There are many I am sure in your area and if the first one does not work for you try another. They are all different. My Mother has been going for years and she credits it with keeping her grounded and not worrying so much about the other person. Whether your husband drinks again or not is not the issue you need to get yourself well and Alanon can help you with that. Good luck and remember to take care of yourself.
Help yourself
Posted by: monicarow
Posted on: 2004-07-29 20:15:09
I am sorry to hear about the situation you are in. I have never been on this before but after reading your message I felt I wanted to e-mail you. I have lived with alcholics most of my life although my husband is not my father and brother both are. The are both sober now and have been for years but just becasue some one stops drinking does not mean that they will all the sudden become a wonderful person. There are a lot of other issues beside just drinking involved. My advice to you would be to get yourself to an Alanon group. There are many I am sure in your area and if the first one does not work for you try another. They are all different. My Mother has been going for years and she credits it with keeping her grounded and not worrying so much about the other person. Whether your husband drinks again or not is not the issue you need to get yourself well and Alanon can help you with that. Good luck and remember to take care of yourself.
Posted by: monicarow
Posted on: 2004-07-29 20:15:09
I am sorry to hear about the situation you are in. I have never been on this before but after reading your message I felt I wanted to e-mail you. I have lived with alcholics most of my life although my husband is not my father and brother both are. The are both sober now and have been for years but just becasue some one stops drinking does not mean that they will all the sudden become a wonderful person. There are a lot of other issues beside just drinking involved. My advice to you would be to get yourself to an Alanon group. There are many I am sure in your area and if the first one does not work for you try another. They are all different. My Mother has been going for years and she credits it with keeping her grounded and not worrying so much about the other person. Whether your husband drinks again or not is not the issue you need to get yourself well and Alanon can help you with that. Good luck and remember to take care of yourself.
Credit
Posted by: leona21921
Posted on: 2004-05-04 09:39:32
These couples, as childish as they are acting, do deserve some credit for recognizing that they have a problem AND seeking help. There is always hope that they will turn things around. I hope that they all learn something from this experience. Good Luck, Dr. Phil!!
Posted by: leona21921
Posted on: 2004-05-04 09:39:32
These couples, as childish as they are acting, do deserve some credit for recognizing that they have a problem AND seeking help. There is always hope that they will turn things around. I hope that they all learn something from this experience. Good Luck, Dr. Phil!!
Getting beneath the surface
Posted by: bluejay813
Posted on: 2004-05-04 13:37:12
I can see how you think that these couples are all lost causes, sunaqua. Their behavior is unacceptable, even shocking. But remember that Dr. Phil is not just trying to correct their behavior; he's trying to get at the heart of the problem. Even though the behavior of these six couples has been similarly awful, the root causes may be different. Some of those problems may be fixable, and some may not be. Dr. Phil said that there was almost no chance of all the couples making it; I predict that there is no chance of all the couples not making it, either.
Posted by: bluejay813
Posted on: 2004-05-04 13:37:12
I can see how you think that these couples are all lost causes, sunaqua. Their behavior is unacceptable, even shocking. But remember that Dr. Phil is not just trying to correct their behavior; he's trying to get at the heart of the problem. Even though the behavior of these six couples has been similarly awful, the root causes may be different. Some of those problems may be fixable, and some may not be. Dr. Phil said that there was almost no chance of all the couples making it; I predict that there is no chance of all the couples not making it, either.
spoiled children become spoiled adults
Posted by: luckwagon
Posted on: 2004-05-04 19:20:57
You're right, they are completely immature brats. They fight for the sake of fighting, to get over on the other person. All of them have ben raised poorly, maybe they saw the same thing growing up, and they're too selfish to break the cycle. Old patterns are hard to break. Let that be a lesson to all of us when we raise our kids... don't give them everything, don't let them get away without being resposible, and teach them to treat others the way they want to be treated!
Posted by: luckwagon
Posted on: 2004-05-04 19:20:57
You're right, they are completely immature brats. They fight for the sake of fighting, to get over on the other person. All of them have ben raised poorly, maybe they saw the same thing growing up, and they're too selfish to break the cycle. Old patterns are hard to break. Let that be a lesson to all of us when we raise our kids... don't give them everything, don't let them get away without being resposible, and teach them to treat others the way they want to be treated!
ABUSED CHILDREN BECOME ABUSIVE ADULTS
Posted by: anon_slc
Posted on: 2004-05-05 11:16:18
The correlations I make of these past few programs are:
ABUSED CHILDREN BECOME ABUSIVE ADULTS
SELF ABSORBED PARENTS BREED SELF-ABSORBED CHILDREN
PARENTS IN DENIAL RAISE CHILDREN IN DENIAL
Once vicious cycle after another...and everyone is in DENIAL.
Posted by: anon_slc
Posted on: 2004-05-05 11:16:18
The correlations I make of these past few programs are:
ABUSED CHILDREN BECOME ABUSIVE ADULTS
SELF ABSORBED PARENTS BREED SELF-ABSORBED CHILDREN
PARENTS IN DENIAL RAISE CHILDREN IN DENIAL
Once vicious cycle after another...and everyone is in DENIAL.
Not all.....not all...
Posted by: capri03
Posted on: 2004-05-06 12:09:31
NOT ALL ABUSED CHILDREN BECOME ABUSIVE ADULTS.
Just as
NOT ALL children who grow up in alcoholic homes become alcoholics.
NOT ALL children raised by self-absorbed parents become self-absorbed.
NOT ALL children who are raised in denial end up in denial.
I think you have some further homework to do.
Often times children have one parent or another person who is a "good role model" and models good behavior, morals, ethics, responsibility, self-confidence and the way things should be.
The child sees they have choices and they choice a different way to live and they flourish.
I'd be happy to discuss this further with you.
Posted by: capri03
Posted on: 2004-05-06 12:09:31
NOT ALL ABUSED CHILDREN BECOME ABUSIVE ADULTS.
Just as
NOT ALL children who grow up in alcoholic homes become alcoholics.
NOT ALL children raised by self-absorbed parents become self-absorbed.
NOT ALL children who are raised in denial end up in denial.
I think you have some further homework to do.
Often times children have one parent or another person who is a "good role model" and models good behavior, morals, ethics, responsibility, self-confidence and the way things should be.
The child sees they have choices and they choice a different way to live and they flourish.
I'd be happy to discuss this further with you.
1/2 TRUE BUT FIXABLE
Posted by: fluffy1570
Posted on: 2004-05-14 11:19:45
You see it over and over again, adult children of imperfect parents, turn into imperfect parents. But isn't that all of us (parents) to an extent. I think there are certain undesirable parenting traits we get from the way we were raised, but at a certain point isn't it our responsibility as adults to recognize what the wrong way is and correct it as best as possible for our own children. This using our parents as an excuse is getting really old. I see it over and over again. If we are mature enough to have our own thoughts and feelings, at a certain point we have the ability to remember how any circumstance made us feel and NOT repeat it in our own lives with the people we love. (spouses and children)
Posted by: fluffy1570
Posted on: 2004-05-14 11:19:45
You see it over and over again, adult children of imperfect parents, turn into imperfect parents. But isn't that all of us (parents) to an extent. I think there are certain undesirable parenting traits we get from the way we were raised, but at a certain point isn't it our responsibility as adults to recognize what the wrong way is and correct it as best as possible for our own children. This using our parents as an excuse is getting really old. I see it over and over again. If we are mature enough to have our own thoughts and feelings, at a certain point we have the ability to remember how any circumstance made us feel and NOT repeat it in our own lives with the people we love. (spouses and children)
not true
Posted by: ucokid
Posted on: 2004-07-28 16:27:13
your life is what you make it. And I don't agree with blamming everything on your parents. If We all did that, then in the end it would be our great great great grandparents fault. It just doesn't make any sense. You are your own person, and you have your personality that God created. We are all different, but how we deal with our each individual personalities is our fault. Not to blamed on our parents for our own mistakes. I am only 20yrs old, but I don't know why people these days don't take responsibility for their own actions. It just doesn't make sense to me. If you are miserable, it's becuase you allowed yourself to be miserable. we all have faults, i'ts just how you deal with them.
Posted by: ucokid
Posted on: 2004-07-28 16:27:13
your life is what you make it. And I don't agree with blamming everything on your parents. If We all did that, then in the end it would be our great great great grandparents fault. It just doesn't make any sense. You are your own person, and you have your personality that God created. We are all different, but how we deal with our each individual personalities is our fault. Not to blamed on our parents for our own mistakes. I am only 20yrs old, but I don't know why people these days don't take responsibility for their own actions. It just doesn't make sense to me. If you are miserable, it's becuase you allowed yourself to be miserable. we all have faults, i'ts just how you deal with them.
passing judgment
Posted by: 5girlsmom
Posted on: 2004-05-04 20:20:10
wow, you are reacting very strongly to these 6 couples' bad behaviors & problems for someone who says they don't care about them...and then follows with very judgmental feelings - that they shouldn't be parents, and that they obviously "don't get what marriage is about." i am in a very troubled marriage at this time & i would love for you to share more of your thoughts with me/us, since you must "get what marriage is all about." sorry if i sound sour, but honey, there but for the grace of God...do you feel better about yourself & your life by passing judgment on others? while these couples are almost imploding themselves before our very eyes, they are very, very real & hurting terribly - God help them....where's your heart?
Posted by: 5girlsmom
Posted on: 2004-05-04 20:20:10
wow, you are reacting very strongly to these 6 couples' bad behaviors & problems for someone who says they don't care about them...and then follows with very judgmental feelings - that they shouldn't be parents, and that they obviously "don't get what marriage is about." i am in a very troubled marriage at this time & i would love for you to share more of your thoughts with me/us, since you must "get what marriage is all about." sorry if i sound sour, but honey, there but for the grace of God...do you feel better about yourself & your life by passing judgment on others? while these couples are almost imploding themselves before our very eyes, they are very, very real & hurting terribly - God help them....where's your heart?
This is in't about just the 6 couples there.
Posted by: irishmossy
Posted on: 2004-05-05 00:13:55
Obviously, you have a strong well-foundationed relationship. Thank goodness you do not have to wake up every morning with the despair of a broken relationship, the fear of raising a child on your own. You have much to be grateful for.
I, however, care very much about what happens to these couples. For I am them. And it may surprise you to know that I was raised in a good home, went to very good schools, was raised by the golden rule. I took, and still take, my vows very seriously. I make sacrifices (choices) for my child, which sometimes I believe I would not make if she were not here. Those sacrifices have built a resentment. Resentment to anger, anger to silence, silence to rejection, and layer upon layer, day after day, I and my husband have woken up, not in love, dejected, rejected, unsupporting, and just mean to each other...and all the things we cognitively know are not supposed to be for married people....but still, here we are.
My husband and I had finally started to speak what we could not say just hours before these shows were aired, not aware that they would be on- that we don't think our marriage will work. We finally said things we were afraid to admit. I told him of my fears of being alone- that's why I stay- my fear of being a single mom- my fear of our future. he told me of how tired he is of me always having to control, of being more of his mother than his wife. How I am friendlier to others outside the home than I am to him, and that is why he'd rather be out than to come home.
And then the first show by chance was on. And we watched, we listened. I cried when I heard the other wives tell of the same things I had just said to my husband. And when other husbands said the same of their wives that mine had said of me.
My husband taped the show for us to watch later. (If you knew him you would realize what a huge move that was) and we watched it together at a better time. We paused it throughout and for the first time identified for ourselves OUR OWN RESPONSIBILITIES IN OUR FAILING MARRIAGE. aND WE HAVE THE SECOND SHOW TAPED TO WATCH TOGETHER TOMORROW.
Are we immature? probably. Do we handle our emotions in a negative way? Absolutely. But I know now that we are not alone. Somehow that validation has given me hope where I thought there was none. So, I absolutely care what happens to these people, because as they go, so do I. What courage they have to open it all up for the nation to see, in spite of those that would th
Posted by: irishmossy
Posted on: 2004-05-05 00:13:55
Obviously, you have a strong well-foundationed relationship. Thank goodness you do not have to wake up every morning with the despair of a broken relationship, the fear of raising a child on your own. You have much to be grateful for.
I, however, care very much about what happens to these couples. For I am them. And it may surprise you to know that I was raised in a good home, went to very good schools, was raised by the golden rule. I took, and still take, my vows very seriously. I make sacrifices (choices) for my child, which sometimes I believe I would not make if she were not here. Those sacrifices have built a resentment. Resentment to anger, anger to silence, silence to rejection, and layer upon layer, day after day, I and my husband have woken up, not in love, dejected, rejected, unsupporting, and just mean to each other...and all the things we cognitively know are not supposed to be for married people....but still, here we are.
My husband and I had finally started to speak what we could not say just hours before these shows were aired, not aware that they would be on- that we don't think our marriage will work. We finally said things we were afraid to admit. I told him of my fears of being alone- that's why I stay- my fear of being a single mom- my fear of our future. he told me of how tired he is of me always having to control, of being more of his mother than his wife. How I am friendlier to others outside the home than I am to him, and that is why he'd rather be out than to come home.
And then the first show by chance was on. And we watched, we listened. I cried when I heard the other wives tell of the same things I had just said to my husband. And when other husbands said the same of their wives that mine had said of me.
My husband taped the show for us to watch later. (If you knew him you would realize what a huge move that was) and we watched it together at a better time. We paused it throughout and for the first time identified for ourselves OUR OWN RESPONSIBILITIES IN OUR FAILING MARRIAGE. aND WE HAVE THE SECOND SHOW TAPED TO WATCH TOGETHER TOMORROW.
Are we immature? probably. Do we handle our emotions in a negative way? Absolutely. But I know now that we are not alone. Somehow that validation has given me hope where I thought there was none. So, I absolutely care what happens to these people, because as they go, so do I. What courage they have to open it all up for the nation to see, in spite of those that would th
Where's your heart
Posted by: vandoren31
Posted on: 2004-05-05 21:30:51
Well since you don't care what happens to these couples then you won't be watching anymore right? Where is your heart and compassion for these people? Just because they are not perfect and I assume you are since you can judge so harshley .It makes me sad that you can write this awful stuff about these couples. Well I absoulutley disagree with you thier marriage is not doomed and putting them in a room for 2 days with Dr. Phil did help them. I actully witness first hand these couples I went to one of the taping and saw there pain and felt how desperate they wanted to be different for eachother and thier children.
You really should care!!
Posted by: vandoren31
Posted on: 2004-05-05 21:30:51
Well since you don't care what happens to these couples then you won't be watching anymore right? Where is your heart and compassion for these people? Just because they are not perfect and I assume you are since you can judge so harshley .It makes me sad that you can write this awful stuff about these couples. Well I absoulutley disagree with you thier marriage is not doomed and putting them in a room for 2 days with Dr. Phil did help them. I actully witness first hand these couples I went to one of the taping and saw there pain and felt how desperate they wanted to be different for eachother and thier children.
You really should care!!
You should care
Posted by: flthomcat
Posted on: 2004-08-01 17:14:39
Like it or not, you SHOULD care about the couples, Sunaqua. Whenever there are children involved, we ALL should care. Divorce is too easy and to prevelent in our society and it's the kids who suffer the most. And they don't deserve to pay for the sins of their parents. At least these haphazzard, complicated, selfish couples are reaching out for help. Nowadays, most couples don't even bother with couseling or trying to keep it all together. They just dump and run...selfish, selfish, selfish. All marriages have some dysfunction and the rest of us (with good marriages) can still learn from these couples. Keep caring. Don't give up on people who are at least TRYING to better their lives and the lives of their children.
Posted by: flthomcat
Posted on: 2004-08-01 17:14:39
Like it or not, you SHOULD care about the couples, Sunaqua. Whenever there are children involved, we ALL should care. Divorce is too easy and to prevelent in our society and it's the kids who suffer the most. And they don't deserve to pay for the sins of their parents. At least these haphazzard, complicated, selfish couples are reaching out for help. Nowadays, most couples don't even bother with couseling or trying to keep it all together. They just dump and run...selfish, selfish, selfish. All marriages have some dysfunction and the rest of us (with good marriages) can still learn from these couples. Keep caring. Don't give up on people who are at least TRYING to better their lives and the lives of their children.
