09/06 Inside the Mind of a Mistress
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Posted by: lisaarn76
Posted on: 2004-09-03 21:19:23
I too am in love with a married man. Have been with him for about 11 years now, still waiting for "when his boys understand" or "when he has a chance." I know in my head that he will never leave, but in my heart, I believe him. I know first hand his wife treats him like dirt, we used to be best friends and I have been there since they met. I know that I am being used but cannot stop from seeing him. Yet it kills me everytime he leaves to go home, knowing he is crawling into bed with HER. I want so much to be free of this, but HOW?
Posted by: lisaarn76
Posted on: 2004-09-03 21:19:23
I too am in love with a married man. Have been with him for about 11 years now, still waiting for "when his boys understand" or "when he has a chance." I know in my head that he will never leave, but in my heart, I believe him. I know first hand his wife treats him like dirt, we used to be best friends and I have been there since they met. I know that I am being used but cannot stop from seeing him. Yet it kills me everytime he leaves to go home, knowing he is crawling into bed with HER. I want so much to be free of this, but HOW?
lisaarn76
Posted by: cjcandace
Posted on: 2004-09-05 08:35:22
That is the ultimate betrayal of a friendship. It doesn't matter how much of a mean person your friend is, or what she has done. If she was your 'best friend' how could you betray her in the worst possible way? That's a huge knife right in her back.
Posted by: cjcandace
Posted on: 2004-09-05 08:35:22
That is the ultimate betrayal of a friendship. It doesn't matter how much of a mean person your friend is, or what she has done. If she was your 'best friend' how could you betray her in the worst possible way? That's a huge knife right in her back.
I agree this is ultimate betrayal
Posted by: nmk711
Posted on: 2004-09-06 15:34:55
Lisa
I'm having touble having sympathy for you, because I don't understand how anyone can be involved with a married man especially the husband of her "friend". You said she treats him like dirt, well obviously he doesn't treat her well either if he is cheating on her. I think your not only betraying your friend but your betraying yoourself. You need to move on and find someone who treats people with respect. Even though I don't agree with what your doing I wish you the best of luck. Oh and is children will NEVER understand, if he ever does leave they will just resent the both of you.
Posted by: nmk711
Posted on: 2004-09-06 15:34:55
Lisa
I'm having touble having sympathy for you, because I don't understand how anyone can be involved with a married man especially the husband of her "friend". You said she treats him like dirt, well obviously he doesn't treat her well either if he is cheating on her. I think your not only betraying your friend but your betraying yoourself. You need to move on and find someone who treats people with respect. Even though I don't agree with what your doing I wish you the best of luck. Oh and is children will NEVER understand, if he ever does leave they will just resent the both of you.
It isn't so black and white
Posted by: paligal
Posted on: 2004-09-07 00:23:48
Firstly, in response to the comment that "his children will NEVER understand", I completely disagree. My parents should have gotten divorced when my father cheated, but my mom convinced him to stay for us,the children, and seeing two people who didn't really love eachother hasn't been good for us, long term. I was happy then that he came back, but now I wish they had divorced, as do my siblings. Of course kids want their parents together in the moment. They also want to eat cake for dinner every day. But we know what's best in the long run as adults, so we disappoint them now to help them later. I say this also because I am going through the pain of losing my love. He was married when we met, with an 8 year old daughter, and he fell for me when we became friends, discussing things that his wife had no interest in and ridiculed in him (poetry,art). I told him he owed it to his daughter to try to work it out with his wife and that I would never be with a married man. I told him I could not be the reason for ending his marriage, and that he had to be 100% sure he couldn't make that work, independent of me. I forced him to take weeks without speaking to me to figure out what he wanted. But his wife had already refused therapy for years,even though they had a loveless marriage. It was always more of a friendship, and it seriously did not matter to her that his emotional needs weren't met, because to her, marriage was/is a "deal", a convenient handyman/doormat that could not leave by law the moment he said "I do". And so many people believe and defend that crap! Anyway, he told his wife he had fallen in love with me, and she was furious. She said it didn't matter that he hadn't been happy, because she had been satisfied with the way things were, not her problem to fix, so it was his issue and his fault. They divorced (he basically gave her everything because she said it was 'his fault'), and he moved into an apartment. She was still furious, and even went so far as to tell their daughter her father didn't love her because he moved out. This couldn't be further from the truth, because he cried continuously about the daughter, and I was constantly left alone because he needed to see her, and his ex-wife wouldn't allow me near her. So, the end of this story is, he was eventually harrassed by his ex-wife, and his wife's family and friends, and the daughter (egged on by the mother) and society at large, into returning, after two years away, to that loveless house and being miserable "for his daughter". We were so happy together. He still loves me and doesn't love his wife, but is sacrificing himself because people like the audiences on Dr. Phil or Oprah say "it's the right thing to do.", and he can't bear his daughter hating him or people thinking he's a bad father or morally wrong. And so the pattern repeats itself, as his daughter will grow up not understanding what a real, loving adult relationship looks like. She will think affection is embarrassing and guilt tripping is normal. And all because "it's the right thing to do." I don't care what people say. I believe emotional honesty is more important than what's "right" on paper, making moral judgement calls on situations you aren't involved in. I am really hurting now, and disagree with his (and his ex-wife's) choices, but I have no choice but to respect it. I know there are many affairs that really are not for love and are deceptive and inconsiderate, and I don't equate them with my situation, but wives out there, ask yourself whether you are making choices out of ego and fear of being alone, or whether your marriage has the potential to be honest and is really repairable. Think long term and rationally instead of just out of hurt and anger. Just my 2 cents from a side of the fence I NEVER expected to be on.
Posted by: paligal
Posted on: 2004-09-07 00:23:48
Firstly, in response to the comment that "his children will NEVER understand", I completely disagree. My parents should have gotten divorced when my father cheated, but my mom convinced him to stay for us,the children, and seeing two people who didn't really love eachother hasn't been good for us, long term. I was happy then that he came back, but now I wish they had divorced, as do my siblings. Of course kids want their parents together in the moment. They also want to eat cake for dinner every day. But we know what's best in the long run as adults, so we disappoint them now to help them later. I say this also because I am going through the pain of losing my love. He was married when we met, with an 8 year old daughter, and he fell for me when we became friends, discussing things that his wife had no interest in and ridiculed in him (poetry,art). I told him he owed it to his daughter to try to work it out with his wife and that I would never be with a married man. I told him I could not be the reason for ending his marriage, and that he had to be 100% sure he couldn't make that work, independent of me. I forced him to take weeks without speaking to me to figure out what he wanted. But his wife had already refused therapy for years,even though they had a loveless marriage. It was always more of a friendship, and it seriously did not matter to her that his emotional needs weren't met, because to her, marriage was/is a "deal", a convenient handyman/doormat that could not leave by law the moment he said "I do". And so many people believe and defend that crap! Anyway, he told his wife he had fallen in love with me, and she was furious. She said it didn't matter that he hadn't been happy, because she had been satisfied with the way things were, not her problem to fix, so it was his issue and his fault. They divorced (he basically gave her everything because she said it was 'his fault'), and he moved into an apartment. She was still furious, and even went so far as to tell their daughter her father didn't love her because he moved out. This couldn't be further from the truth, because he cried continuously about the daughter, and I was constantly left alone because he needed to see her, and his ex-wife wouldn't allow me near her. So, the end of this story is, he was eventually harrassed by his ex-wife, and his wife's family and friends, and the daughter (egged on by the mother) and society at large, into returning, after two years away, to that loveless house and being miserable "for his daughter". We were so happy together. He still loves me and doesn't love his wife, but is sacrificing himself because people like the audiences on Dr. Phil or Oprah say "it's the right thing to do.", and he can't bear his daughter hating him or people thinking he's a bad father or morally wrong. And so the pattern repeats itself, as his daughter will grow up not understanding what a real, loving adult relationship looks like. She will think affection is embarrassing and guilt tripping is normal. And all because "it's the right thing to do." I don't care what people say. I believe emotional honesty is more important than what's "right" on paper, making moral judgement calls on situations you aren't involved in. I am really hurting now, and disagree with his (and his ex-wife's) choices, but I have no choice but to respect it. I know there are many affairs that really are not for love and are deceptive and inconsiderate, and I don't equate them with my situation, but wives out there, ask yourself whether you are making choices out of ego and fear of being alone, or whether your marriage has the potential to be honest and is really repairable. Think long term and rationally instead of just out of hurt and anger. Just my 2 cents from a side of the fence I NEVER expected to be on.
Posted by: freakiechk
Posted on: 2004-09-07 00:55:18
You know what? I think you clouded his judgement in what really made him "happy". If he was emotionally detached and angry all the time -- well no kidding his wife and he were having problems. He had divided loyalties. Him being with YOU ... feeling guilty, feeling divided, conflicted, confused ... didn't contribute to his "working on the relationship". His wife was betrayed. Just because he may habve decided (when you and he stopped talking) that he wanted to work on it, doesn't mean that she can flick a switch and decide to trust him. And you say that he and his wife had "more of a friendship". Wow. Great friend. I wish I had a friend like him who would lie and betray me. GREAT!! Maybe your lack of respect for marriage comes from your parents' marital problems.
Posted by: paligal
Posted on: 2004-09-07 07:35:31
In response: His wife and he were married for 13 years, and he asked her way before he ever met me to go to therapy, and she said no. And when we stopped talking because I insisted on it, he decided he couldn't work on it because to her, that meant "you suck it up and do things my way", as it had the times before that he had tried to talk to her. He didn't lie to her, because he told her about his feelings for me before it ever developed. But, I can't go into the 2 years of details in our relationship here. That's my point. Every situation is different. It isn't black and white, not something that is right or wrong on paper. I actually have a great deal of respect for marriage, which is why, even though I felt love for this man, I told him he needed to go back and figure out his marriage with her and respect her enough not to lie. I mean, I refused to be with him until his divorce was final. And to me, marriage is more than a piece of paper that legally forces someone to stay with you, even though they are miserable and disrespected. Marriage implies a bond that is emotional to me, and so many people feel completely righteous about their "right" to their spouse because of the paper, while they break that bond emotionally. How is his wife entitled to have his continuing devotion when she refuses to acknowledge 10 years of his unhappiness (they were married 13 years), for which he tried over and over to get help from her with? Because a piece of paper, and nothing else (as in her actions) says so? What about emotional integrity? Why are people so content to live lies because they feel entitled to it? She knew he was unhappy, yet still felt entitled because they were married. At what point does a spouse's responsibility toward a loveless marriage end? Are they still morally required to stay if they don't love their husband/wife and never will? After trying to learn to love a spouse again, if after a few years, it doesn't work, isn't someone entitled to live for themselves at all and be happy? Because I have trouble with living in a world where love isn't the primary motivation for marriage and sticking things out. Yes, I'm sure my parent's marriage colors my view. But it doesn't make me disrespect marriage. It makes me idealize it even more. It makes me hope that marriage can be better than that, and that people won't throw their lives away being miserable with people they don't love "because it's the right thing", but that marriage means two people who love each other enough to work hard at it together.
Don't Be So Harsh
Posted by: poetmom
Posted on: 2004-09-07 13:20:54
How do you know that he hadn't been feeling emotionally detached for YEARS before he ever got into the affair with her? My now husband and his now ex had lived like roommates for nearly 15 yrs by the time we met, and my now ex and I had been doing the same for about three years. But we thought that was just how marriage was supposed to be, and that anything else was only in fairy tales, so we made the best of it---UNTIL we met each other and learned that the love we had always dreamed of COULD be real, as long as we were willing to work at it every single day.
Posted by: poetmom
Posted on: 2004-09-07 13:20:54
How do you know that he hadn't been feeling emotionally detached for YEARS before he ever got into the affair with her? My now husband and his now ex had lived like roommates for nearly 15 yrs by the time we met, and my now ex and I had been doing the same for about three years. But we thought that was just how marriage was supposed to be, and that anything else was only in fairy tales, so we made the best of it---UNTIL we met each other and learned that the love we had always dreamed of COULD be real, as long as we were willing to work at it every single day.
AMEN
Posted by: crespita
Posted on: 2004-09-08 10:45:41
Poet Mom:
It is so refreshing to find someone that lives in the real world! I congratulate you for finding happiness and being brave enough to grab hold of it. I have done the same. I was unhappy for 10 years of my life, married to someone who was abusive. I met my sunshine. Timing was not right...many criticized but the key is until you are in such a situation don't judge! I used to think how terrible how can anyone get involved in such a situation until it happened to me. I am now nearing divorce as is the love of my life. We are happy. Sometimes you have to look out for your own happiness.
Posted by: crespita
Posted on: 2004-09-08 10:45:41
Poet Mom:
It is so refreshing to find someone that lives in the real world! I congratulate you for finding happiness and being brave enough to grab hold of it. I have done the same. I was unhappy for 10 years of my life, married to someone who was abusive. I met my sunshine. Timing was not right...many criticized but the key is until you are in such a situation don't judge! I used to think how terrible how can anyone get involved in such a situation until it happened to me. I am now nearing divorce as is the love of my life. We are happy. Sometimes you have to look out for your own happiness.
Crespita:
Posted by: grotte
Posted on: 2004-09-12 18:36:31
I too found the love of my life through an "affair", after putting up with my then husband cheating on me time and time again, I turned to a mutual freind and his fiancee for support. After several months of support I found my self falling for the mutual freind. Yes I felt guilty because he and his fiancee both befreinded me in my time of need. I liked his fiancee, she gave me a great deal of support in my time of need. Two more months passed and I got a knock on my door, it was our mutual freind, he left his fiancee because she was having an affair with my soon to be ex husband.
It has been 20 years, and I am happily marreid to the mutual freind and we have a beautiful 15 year old son!
I wish you the best and hope that you have many years of happy bliss!!!
Posted by: grotte
Posted on: 2004-09-12 18:36:31
I too found the love of my life through an "affair", after putting up with my then husband cheating on me time and time again, I turned to a mutual freind and his fiancee for support. After several months of support I found my self falling for the mutual freind. Yes I felt guilty because he and his fiancee both befreinded me in my time of need. I liked his fiancee, she gave me a great deal of support in my time of need. Two more months passed and I got a knock on my door, it was our mutual freind, he left his fiancee because she was having an affair with my soon to be ex husband.
It has been 20 years, and I am happily marreid to the mutual freind and we have a beautiful 15 year old son!
I wish you the best and hope that you have many years of happy bliss!!!
no one should stay in an abusive relationship
Posted by: wink3x
Posted on: 2004-09-15 12:53:13
no one should stay in an abusive relationship, but you know your the chances of success with the new one are only 5%. I am glad you were smart and got away from the abuser, too bad a bunch of other people had to get hurt too.
Posted by: wink3x
Posted on: 2004-09-15 12:53:13
no one should stay in an abusive relationship, but you know your the chances of success with the new one are only 5%. I am glad you were smart and got away from the abuser, too bad a bunch of other people had to get hurt too.
I Also Met My Sunshine
Posted by: mrsauer
Posted on: 2004-11-11 18:47:51
I loved your comment and commend you for it!! I, too, was unhappy for many years and met someone I fell in love with at 7-11 over morning coffee. He is married and so am I. Both of us have been married for 22 years and have not been happy for quite a while. My husband found out in February and his wife found out in June. Both our spouses think that we no longer see each other but that couldn't be farther from the truth. We are truly meant for each other but the timing is not right. It hasn't been easy for either of us but we are both being patient and understanding. It would have been much easier to just end it but neither one of us can because we truly love one another. We are not jumping into anything without thinking things through. There are children involved and we are taking that into consideration. People should not judge anyone that is involved in an affair until they walk in their shoes. Sometimes you just can't help who you fall in love with. This whole situation just happened and neither one of us ever imagined we would fall in love like we have. It is a beautiful thing and we are not going to give it up for the sake of everyone else. Some may see that as a very selfish attitude. Life is too short to be unhappy. We are working together to make this as easy as possible for all those concerned. It is just going to take time. It is hard but we know that someday we will be together.
Posted by: mrsauer
Posted on: 2004-11-11 18:47:51
I loved your comment and commend you for it!! I, too, was unhappy for many years and met someone I fell in love with at 7-11 over morning coffee. He is married and so am I. Both of us have been married for 22 years and have not been happy for quite a while. My husband found out in February and his wife found out in June. Both our spouses think that we no longer see each other but that couldn't be farther from the truth. We are truly meant for each other but the timing is not right. It hasn't been easy for either of us but we are both being patient and understanding. It would have been much easier to just end it but neither one of us can because we truly love one another. We are not jumping into anything without thinking things through. There are children involved and we are taking that into consideration. People should not judge anyone that is involved in an affair until they walk in their shoes. Sometimes you just can't help who you fall in love with. This whole situation just happened and neither one of us ever imagined we would fall in love like we have. It is a beautiful thing and we are not going to give it up for the sake of everyone else. Some may see that as a very selfish attitude. Life is too short to be unhappy. We are working together to make this as easy as possible for all those concerned. It is just going to take time. It is hard but we know that someday we will be together.
Judging?
Posted by: d27m31
Posted on: 2004-12-10 16:49:53
Just as I stated to Crespita, if you're not happy in a marriage and you've done everything possible to make it work(GOD)then someone has to be strong enough to call it quits before it causes you to have affairs! Adultrey is wrong anyway you look at it! There is no justification for it! you don't have to stay in the unhappy marriage you're in, but you must make the right choices in dealing with it. Divorce before Adultrey! It sounds like ALOT of you do not have a relationship with GOD at all!
Posted by: d27m31
Posted on: 2004-12-10 16:49:53
Just as I stated to Crespita, if you're not happy in a marriage and you've done everything possible to make it work(GOD)then someone has to be strong enough to call it quits before it causes you to have affairs! Adultrey is wrong anyway you look at it! There is no justification for it! you don't have to stay in the unhappy marriage you're in, but you must make the right choices in dealing with it. Divorce before Adultrey! It sounds like ALOT of you do not have a relationship with GOD at all!
Posted by: ynksfan05
Posted on: 2005-06-06 01:23:19
I too agree that other people can offer all kinds of advice, but until you are in the situation yourself, you cannot possibly know what you are talking about.I never would have guessed I would be in the situation that I am. Holidays are difficult for both of us. No one said it would be easy, and life is too short to be miserable. It is like any other relationship, there are some ups and downs, but the test is working through them, and we do.
To Crespita
Posted by: d27m31
Posted on: 2004-12-10 16:45:56
Crespita, no one said that you should stay in an abusive marriage. The point that you're missing is that there is a right way and a wrong way to do anything! Someone in the marriage has to make the tough decision to call it quits! And I did say TOUGH decision and that's after you have tried everything to make it work! Don't let it get to the point of committing adultrey! Especially if your in an abusive marriage, say enough is enough on your own, without a third party and get out! In my situation, I was completely blind sided by my husbands affair. He didn't come to me about what he was feeling(Boredom). He didn't come to me and say, honey i'm bored with our marriage, what can WE do to spice it up! I didn't find out until Boom, the affair! And I only found out what his supposed reason was when we went to counseling. You see, my husband is 33 and he's afraid of getting old. So, what does he do, he goes and get him a 23yr old?! As if that's going to slow his aging down?! So, I filed for a divorce, i didn't go and have an AFFAIR too! I filed and he doesn't want to sign?! You see, some men don't really have an accuse for affairs, they create justifications. Just another case of having your cake and eating it too!
Posted by: d27m31
Posted on: 2004-12-10 16:45:56
Crespita, no one said that you should stay in an abusive marriage. The point that you're missing is that there is a right way and a wrong way to do anything! Someone in the marriage has to make the tough decision to call it quits! And I did say TOUGH decision and that's after you have tried everything to make it work! Don't let it get to the point of committing adultrey! Especially if your in an abusive marriage, say enough is enough on your own, without a third party and get out! In my situation, I was completely blind sided by my husbands affair. He didn't come to me about what he was feeling(Boredom). He didn't come to me and say, honey i'm bored with our marriage, what can WE do to spice it up! I didn't find out until Boom, the affair! And I only found out what his supposed reason was when we went to counseling. You see, my husband is 33 and he's afraid of getting old. So, what does he do, he goes and get him a 23yr old?! As if that's going to slow his aging down?! So, I filed for a divorce, i didn't go and have an AFFAIR too! I filed and he doesn't want to sign?! You see, some men don't really have an accuse for affairs, they create justifications. Just another case of having your cake and eating it too!
It is work every day
Posted by: wink3x
Posted on: 2004-09-15 12:51:07
It is work every day and that is apparently what you failed to learn in your first marriages. Glad you got it. Hope you remember it when the going gets tough with the new love.
Posted by: wink3x
Posted on: 2004-09-15 12:51:07
It is work every day and that is apparently what you failed to learn in your first marriages. Glad you got it. Hope you remember it when the going gets tough with the new love.
Don't blame her parents
Posted by: diamondsna
Posted on: 2004-11-14 16:15:33
Don't blame her parents. That was not in her control. Just like society is not in her control. The truth is alot of people have lost the respect for marriage that it once held. Women are not putting up with selfish men. This guy could have divorced his wife, but didn't--he cheated her. It is this man's fault for deceiving those he's involved with. This behavior is what brings a lack of respect for marriage. So don't blame the woman for what is the deceitful behavior of the man.
Posted by: diamondsna
Posted on: 2004-11-14 16:15:33
Don't blame her parents. That was not in her control. Just like society is not in her control. The truth is alot of people have lost the respect for marriage that it once held. Women are not putting up with selfish men. This guy could have divorced his wife, but didn't--he cheated her. It is this man's fault for deceiving those he's involved with. This behavior is what brings a lack of respect for marriage. So don't blame the woman for what is the deceitful behavior of the man.
I understand
Posted by: jftoct
Posted on: 2004-09-07 09:19:04
Bravo, Bravo. It's so refreshing to read a comment from a person who so clearly understands that not all relationships involving a married man are the same. If every situation was the same, then we could solve all our problems with the same solution. I am in 100% agreement that by doing the "right thing" is not a guarantee that the marriage is going to work out. How many years of trying are we supposed to endure before we realize that it's not working, that no one is happy trying to pretend that all is well. I believe that some women live in a loveless marriage because they don't want to have to work at anything. The husband is trying and the wife is letting him do all the work because she knows she can treat him anyway she wants and he's not going anywhere. Maybe if more spouses stood up for their happiness and refused to accept anything less than they deserved there would be a lot more happy couples in this world. I don't believe in staying in a marriage that doesn't fulfill your emotional, spiritual & physical being. This is the only life we're getting..it's not a dress rehearsal.
Posted by: jftoct
Posted on: 2004-09-07 09:19:04
Bravo, Bravo. It's so refreshing to read a comment from a person who so clearly understands that not all relationships involving a married man are the same. If every situation was the same, then we could solve all our problems with the same solution. I am in 100% agreement that by doing the "right thing" is not a guarantee that the marriage is going to work out. How many years of trying are we supposed to endure before we realize that it's not working, that no one is happy trying to pretend that all is well. I believe that some women live in a loveless marriage because they don't want to have to work at anything. The husband is trying and the wife is letting him do all the work because she knows she can treat him anyway she wants and he's not going anywhere. Maybe if more spouses stood up for their happiness and refused to accept anything less than they deserved there would be a lot more happy couples in this world. I don't believe in staying in a marriage that doesn't fulfill your emotional, spiritual & physical being. This is the only life we're getting..it's not a dress rehearsal.
trying to justify something??
Posted by: juliebgg
Posted on: 2004-09-07 10:14:57
Are you trying to justify something?? You sound as if you are in a relationship where the man is saying that his wife treats him badly. If so, have you ever thought about how many times this line is used? (She doesn't understand me, she let herself go, she makes me do everything, and best of all, we don't sleep together). More likely the guy is immature and self-centered and just looking for some childish fun that he justifies with these lame excuses. If he really wanted out he would get out but he probably has it too good...two fools on the string. Why should he get out?
Posted by: juliebgg
Posted on: 2004-09-07 10:14:57
Are you trying to justify something?? You sound as if you are in a relationship where the man is saying that his wife treats him badly. If so, have you ever thought about how many times this line is used? (She doesn't understand me, she let herself go, she makes me do everything, and best of all, we don't sleep together). More likely the guy is immature and self-centered and just looking for some childish fun that he justifies with these lame excuses. If he really wanted out he would get out but he probably has it too good...two fools on the string. Why should he get out?
Not At All
Posted by: jftoct
Posted on: 2004-09-07 11:03:44
I'm trying to say that not all relationships that involve married men are the same. How can you judge someone you don't know? All situations are different, & not all men use the line that "he's being treated badly". And no, I haven't heard that line or any of the other lines you referred to. We have a friendship, not a fantasy.
Posted by: jftoct
Posted on: 2004-09-07 11:03:44
I'm trying to say that not all relationships that involve married men are the same. How can you judge someone you don't know? All situations are different, & not all men use the line that "he's being treated badly". And no, I haven't heard that line or any of the other lines you referred to. We have a friendship, not a fantasy.
Posted by: southern10
Posted on: 2004-09-07 17:29:19
Have you ever thought that maybe when a guy says his wife treats him badly, she doesn't understand him, she lets herself go, she makes him do everything, and they don't sleep together that maybe that's the truth? Are you so bitter and angry that you don't believe anything anyone says? I've seen women, friends of mine, who actually do treat their husbands like that. Their husbands may or may not cheat, but I can't blame the guys if they do. If a woman wants to keep a husband, then give him a reason to come home, not just to pay the mortgage or take out the trash. How about a smile and a kiss and even, God forbid, thanks for taking care of us today! Think about it!
