06/14 Disaster Weddings

Posted by: jbrown115
Posted on: 2005-02-22 09:33:25

My husband and I didn't have a "wedding", we got married. I was 16 and he was 18, I was 6 months pregnant, and my parents didn't want us to be together. We met in high school, in the library of all places, in Arizona and it was instant eternal love. As I said though my parents didn't see things my way. So, we ran away to Georgia to get married. We bought our rings at a pawn shop, and had a little ceremony and our honey moon was the Motel 6 on the way back to Arizona. 12 and a half years and four kids later we are as happy and blissfully in love as that day in the library. Of course I would have liked a wedding with friends and family there, a reception, and a honeymoon, but our day was perfect for us, and what a cool story for our kids...

Janet Brown

Sembach AFB, Germany
Nice story
Posted by: renior
Posted on: 2005-02-22 22:11:56

I really enjoyed reading about your wedding. I think that you can have a wedding in a library in AZ and I love your honeymoon. It seems to me that you went right by all of the hassles and jumped right to the loving. That was bold and look at you now! It is a great story. Congratulations!
Take a lesson from golfers!
Posted by: promark
Posted on: 2005-02-22 09:41:03

OK drunken bride.....ask hubby for a mulligan.....or better yet....a "DO OVER". Make it a small affair....quaint....and set your mind at ease....It's not the mistakes we make in life that should control us....it's how we rebound! TAKE THE "DO OVER" AND MOVE ON!
One day in a lifetime
Posted by: touchedby
Posted on: 2005-02-22 09:41:03

I think these guys all need to get a sense of perspective about their wedding day. Whether a marriage survives the test of time depends on much more than how picture perfect the wedding phtographs are!

I got married in a cancer hospital in between chemo treatments - that was fifteen years ago and I am still very happily married (and alive!!).

Love and mutual respect conquers all!

God bless Dr Phil :)
Count your Blessings!!!
Posted by: shemac3
Posted on: 2005-02-22 15:00:52

Oh, my Goodness! To all of you on today's show....if that is the worse thing that has happened to you,(wedding day problems), consider yourself very fortunate. Time to count your many other blessings and GET ON WITH YOUR LIFE!! With all the tragedy in this world, you would think that you would just count that day as a stepping stone in a world that isn't always perfect...but a world that can also bring much joy and happiness in days to come. That was yesterday, this is today...make the best of the present!! That's all that really matters.

Posted by: gretasgram
Posted on: 2005-02-22 16:49:23

Amen, I am unable to believe the amount of immaturity that is out there. It just gets worse and worse...grow the H up
IMMATURE BRIDES
Posted by: melissatow
Posted on: 2005-02-22 22:37:36

You know what a bad wedding can be devistation. My husband and I had a very very bad wedding everything went wrong...the florist didnt show (car accident) my dad thrented my step dad and the police showed up. My dad threw a chair and stomped off and left my wedding. Hardly anybody ended up showing up for our wedding. The pictures didnt turn out we ended up paying 700 dollars for 3 rolls of film, and the cater cut up the top of my wedding cake.
My mother in law told my husband that I was a B**** and she didnt want to come to the wedding.. so on and so forth. That isnt even the half of it when it comes to my wedding day disaster. This was supposed to be my and my husbands day and everybody was trying to ruin it. I love my husband and we have a great relationship but it doesnt change the fact that my wedding was a big disaster and there isnt too much that we can do to change it but the memory of it burns in my mind. I am supposed to smile when I think of my wedding day instead it makes me very angry. Why do others have to be so selfish. I wish that I could have a DO OVER but some people cant afford that sort of thing. So before you go pointing fingers saying that us brides that had a bad wedding why dont you get the whole story. I dont wish a wedding disaster on anyone. I just wish that I could do it over and have a wedding of my dreams. I have had a picture of my dream wedding and my actual wedding wasnt anything close..

Posted by: lilysgift
Posted on: 2005-02-23 18:47:41

I think you win for the more upsetting wedding day. How are your inlaws now?

I married someone because I thought he'd stalk me if I tried to get rid of him and that he'd hurt my son. Living with him still isn't easy, but even that awful beginning I was able to move beyond because I dragged him to an excellent marriage counselor.

His mother was a witch and was horrible to my son and me until I publicly embarassed her in front of all her friends. Then she respected me. Yuk.
IN LAWS
Posted by: melissatow
Posted on: 2005-02-25 12:12:14

My in laws are so so.... we live about 200 miles away from them.... My motherin law is nice to my face..well that is about all i can say about her. She said that we were too young to get married and that we should continue to just raise our son together without getting married. She has never really been a grandmother to our son... and it breaks my husbands heart. It doesnt matter weather we go to see her.. he doesnt know her at all. Now we have an 8 month old daughter and she has only seen her once because we happen to be visiting others.
GET OVER IT!
Posted by: mj3723
Posted on: 2005-02-24 02:55:43

Be thankful you were alive when your wedding day came. Just 6 days ago a 24 year old lost her finance. The last six months was spent in the hospital, mostly in the Intensive Care Unit. They had been together for seven years and have a four year old child. Her finance was never well enough to have a wedding. He had fought for everyday that he was alive. I'm sure she would have loved to have had ANY of your wedding problems. It is truely a very sad story, my heart is in pieces for her and their child.

Boo hoo hoo! My wedding day wasn't everything I dreamed of...it wasn't my fairy tale I dreamed of... come on people get real! In a world that tomorrow is not guarenteed, enjoy everyday that you do have. Why waste energy crying over what didn't happen.! When I think of disasters I think of 9/11/01, Florida 2003, Tsunami 12/26/04.... I think disasters are where people have lost their lives.

As I tell my boys...RELAX! is the house on fire? is someone bleeding? If the answers are No. Then whatever it is, it'll work out.

Life is what you make it.
Quit feeling sorry for yourself.
Not over it
Posted by: melissatow
Posted on: 2005-02-25 12:12:14

I feel really bad that she had her fiance die, but I am just sick of family members trying to wreck our happiness. My parents were divorced when I was 8 years old and have been fighting like they were married ever since. My wedding became a battle ground for them, I just wanted to have my father walk me down the isle and have my daddy daughter dance. I wanted my relatives to show up instead of 65 people out of 200. I have never been able to have a day where family could put their diffrences aside. My husband is the best blessing I could ever have, but I guess I just have a little bit of the green eyed monster in me for people who are able to have a loving extended family. Not a fighting one. I guess one of the lessons that I can learn through this is that My wedding was a disaster.... my marriage is bliss, but if I get a re wedding my family isnt invited. I am very blessed with 2 beautiful children and my husband and I have beat the odds considering we were teen parents ( at least for the first one) I just wanted to have a day to remember.... not a day that I just want to forget.. But If I fotgot it ( or forget it) then I wouldnt have my husband. In our life we try to help others above ourselves in hopes that someday it will be returned. But My husband and I have made it.... I just really wanted my day... to be a princess. PS. I also had a horrible ankle injury and had to wear a huge ugly black boot underneath my beautiful wedding gown. From when I fell down the stairs 2 weeks earlier. I guess God doesnt give you more than you can handle.
Again, Get Over It.
Posted by: mj3723
Posted on: 2005-02-26 18:34:57

melissatow,
why do you say "but if I GET a re wedding..." Get a wedding? From who? If you want a re-wedding ... THEN DO IT. But how would that make everything right?

About your ankle...big deal! Some things in life you just need to laugh about, lighten up.
NOT OVER IT
Posted by: melissatow
Posted on: 2005-02-28 09:43:46

If I could I would... I dont have the tools to have a do over wedding... Please dont judge people who cannot re do their wedding.... I am to busy taking care of my children to do that. In order to re do my wedding I would need$$$$$ and I dont have that. Like I said before.. my wedding didnt wreck my marriage I just want a happy memory of that day... instead of the police showing up because my dad said that he wanted a gun.... you know being that my DJ was an ex police comissioner. It was all so stupid. I let others ruin my day... and I just wish that I wouldnt have let them do that. THere are some things that you cant fix. So just BACK OFF
get over it
Posted by: marleeann
Posted on: 2005-02-26 16:52:49

Not everypreson has the tools to get "over it" I must say I was a guest that day. We do not have any control over the titles they use on the show. I feel "diaster Weddings" was too harsh of a show title. We did debate that with he producers There are alot of people casting judgemet here. Lonely people maye who knows I know one thing you people are very judmental to leave comments like you do on this site. Is it that important to judge us; when you get caght up in these shows, progrms etc REMEBER ITS TELEVISION PEOPLE
Find the tools.
Posted by: mj3723
Posted on: 2005-02-26 18:34:57

Your choice, either find the tools to get over things, or don't. Your life, your choice.
JUDGEMENTAL????
Posted by: shemac3
Posted on: 2005-02-27 17:08:38

Well, Marlee14, we all have the right to our opinion and my opinion is, "GET OVER IT!" My word, you all acted like it was the END OF THE WORLD because you didn't have the Perfect Wedding. Big Deal....to dwell on something like that for such a long time is just plain ridiculous!! Get the 'TOOLS' you need and get over it and stop all that foolish whining!!!
Plain and Simple!!!
Posted by: leann608
Posted on: 2005-02-28 15:37:53

Well, you nailed that on directly on. You put my thoughts into words. GREAT JOB!
Amen to that!
Posted by: kmangers
Posted on: 2005-06-15 07:55:57

Every one has there idea of a 'dream
wedding'. Notice the word dream. After you 'grow up' you realize that isn't what it is about. Overcome - improvise and adapt.
Painful
Posted by: suzy4653
Posted on: 2005-02-22 19:03:26

It was painful for me to watch Melanie. She is choosing to be the victim and it is ruining her marriage. A marriage is not about the wedding. There are people out there who can't even afford to have a wedding. Every wedding does not go smoothly, but who cares. You are marrying the person you love and thats all that matters. The flowers, the cake, the theme of the wedding are so unimportant. It is about you two making a commiment infront of your friends and family.

I am a newlywed of six months. My husband and I were together for six years and we were planning a huge wedding. Then my dad took a turn for the worse and in two months we through together a wedding. My father was so weak we both tripped walking up the stairs, because I was trying to balance him and my heavy boquet. Then my crazy Aunt took is open herself to line her dress with many political buttons and insulted many of my guests with her behavior. Then my aunt infront of everyone, said the cake was disgusting and couldn't believe that I chose an Italian Creme cake. Then she proceded to tell me that the bridesmaids hair looked horrible. Little did she know my hairdresser was sitting at the same table as her. Then when we finally made it to the hotel, ny husband had the ruins all night long and I fell asleep in my wedding dress. WHO CARES!!!

My father passed three months after my wedding and I am just so Thankful he was able to walk me down the aisle. Never once have I been mad with all my wedding mishaps. That day was the best day of my life and I am married to the most amazing man. That is what I chose to focus on.

Every wedding has it's problems, but do not allow that one day to come between you and your and your hubby. You have the rest of your life together, to create magical, wonderful memories.
:)
Posted by: renior
Posted on: 2005-02-22 22:17:22

I enjoyed your story, too. So many little disasters, but you really have it all in perspective. How nice that your father walked you down the aisle before he passed. How wonderful. Congrats.;)