The Fourteen Days of Loving with Honesty Dyads

Day 9

EVENING ACTIVITY
Set up the dyad, having your book and a clock or timer handy. Remember to choose a time that is free of distraction.

Step 1: Silently make and maintain eye contact for two minutes.
Step 2: Topics for intimate disclosure:

Partner A: "My 'tapes' or fixed beliefs about men are. . ." Three minutes

Partner B: "Thank you for caring enough to share, and I promise to weigh it carefully."

Partner B: "My 'tapes' or fixed beliefs about men are. . ." Three minutes

Partner A: "Thank you for caring enough to share, and I promise to weigh it carefully."

Partner A: "My 'tapes' or fixed beliefs about women are. . ." Three minutes

Partner B: "Thank you for caring enough to share, and I promise to weigh it carefully."

Partner B: "My 'tapes' or fixed beliefs about women are. . ." Three minutes

Partner A: "Thank you for caring enough to share, and I promise to weigh it carefully."

Partner A: "My 'tapes' or fixed beliefs about relationships are. . ." Three minutes

Partner B: "Thank you for caring enough to share, and I promise to weigh it carefully."

Partner B: "My 'tapes' or fixed beliefs about relationships are. . ." Three minutes

Partner A: "Thank you for caring enough to share, and I promise to weigh it carefully."

Step 3: Stand and hug for thirty seconds.

Step 4: Please record your thoughts and feelings in your personal journal for five minutes minimum.

Footnote to Day 9: "Tapes" are those seemingly mindless but recurrent thoughts and beliefs that we have about certain things in our lives. These tapes are fixed beliefs that have run through your mind so many times that they are almost if not completely automatic, and can only be eliminated or compensated for when consciously acknowledged. Examples: Men are driven by sex. Men are insensitive. Women are flighty. Women are manipulative.



Go to day:   1  |  2  |  3  |  4  |  5  |  6  |  7  |  8  |  9  |  10  |  11  |  12  |  13  |  14  



For a more in-depth look at yourself, your partner and how to reconnect, you can read Relationship Rescue and do the exercises in Dr Phil's Relationship Rescue Workbook.