Alexandra Live Chat Transcript

Alexandra from the Dr. Phil Family participated in a live chat on DrPhil.com to talk about her children, her relationship with her boyfriend, Tony, and her future. Below is the full text of her conversation.

 

 

 

Chat_Moderator: Hi everyone. Welcome to the Dr. Phil show chat with Alexandra from the Dr. Phil Family. Alexandra will be here at 8:00 p.m. ET/5:00 p.m. PT. You can start sending in your questions for Alexandra now. We will answer as many as we can!

 
Alexandra: Hi everyone, let's get started!
 
tracey9021: Hey Alex! How have things changed since Dr. Phil gave you an ultimatum??
 
Alexandra:  I guess, I'll be more likely to think twice before I ask anybody for anything.
 
pei_jess2010:  If you could change one, and only one thing about your life, what would it be and why?
 
Alexandra: If I could change one thing, I would have to think about it … and unfortunately, we don't have that much time, but I would probably change… I would probably change something about myself to better my children. There's a lot of things I'd change, I'm not sure of just one. But it would be to better my children's lives.
 
topo4u20: Alex, how come your dad does not come to the shows? I'm hoping you and your sister are still close to him. I know myself as a father that daughters need their fathers big time.
 
Alexandra: My dad is very involved in both mine and my sister's life. His job requires him to be discreet. But his support has never faltered for both my sister and myself.
 
cathy2010: Why is it you act like you don't care but yet you have this petrified look on your face, Alexandra? Like you are scared to death.
 
Alexandra: I don't think I act like I don't care. I keep my emotions very guarded. But what I'm going through is scary, so having a scared look … well, I am scared. The situation is scary. I have a lot of things, and so much going on that requires emotional support and my full attention and emotion and unfortunately, sometimes, I'm just emotionally drained and I try to give it my best, but at the same time, my emotions are spent.
 
pinsktingray84: Alexandra, do you feel like a pregnant young lady should be, by feeling full of joy and excitement again? Or are you afraid of the obstacles you will soon have to face?
 
Alexandra: Definitely BOTH! I'm happy and filled with joy, but I also know there are obstacles. And no matter how much joy I feel, it doesn't subside what I know is to come.
 
I just want to give this baby the same opportunities that my other children have â€" even better. I want them all to have the same opportunities to succeed and enjoy life. I'm most joyful to have the babies father be excited and hands on throughout the pregnancy.
 
joanne4413: Alex after you have this 3rd child are you planning on getting your tubes tied???
 
Alexandra: Having your tubes tied is a very dangerous and invasive surgery, and I'm young. The health risks involved in that surgery, outweigh the other options. But I'm done after this one. And I will be taking a more permanent measure, just not that invasive.
 
megz_89:  Hi there Alex. My question is do you really think Tony will stick around after you have your baby?
 
Alexandra: Well, if Tony is willing to stick through the drama I'm going through right now, I think he's in it for the long haul!
 
Things are going good right now. He's being very supportive and continues to want what's best for me and my kids.
 
brandisowards1: Alexandra why are you choosing to live with Tony instead of your children?
 
Alexandra:  Because even if Tony moved out, at this point, I still couldn't live with my kids.
 
dwfocus: Alex, how are your other two children doing, are they excited about get younger brother/sister?
 
Alexandra: Leilah doesn't really understand and I will tell Nathan with the time is appropriate â€" when things become more settled and he has a better schedule. Right now, Nathan has a lot to deal with and I just don't want to add to that. I'm not sure how I'll tell him, but he'll like having another little brother or sister!
 
aleash13: Alex, have you investigated who might have hurt your daughter and what steps you will take to make sure that will not happen again?
 
Alexandra: Leilah continues to thrive and grow and is very healthy and happy. And I'm doing everything I can to ensure that it stays that way!
 
cathy2010: Does Tony have a good job that he can support you and your child?
 
Alexandra: Tony is constantly working towards finding a better job. The local job market hasn't been too great out there but he's even put in an application at McDonald's. I try not to put too much energy into that, and will deal with it as it comes. Tony wants to open up his own off-road construction company.
 
pei_jess2010: How would you feel if the roles were reversed and Katherine was in your position?
 
Alexandra: I would support her, and play whatever role she needed me to play at that time. I think that life in general has made our relationship less than ordinary, but in the end, Katherine knows that I will always be there for her and always want what's best for her.
 
pei_jess2010: Before all of this happened, what did you picture you would do when you were older?
 
Alexandra: The same thing I want to do now. I want to be a delivery nurse. I want to go back to school after everything is settled.
 
nosiejosie: Why did it seem like you enjoyed seeing Chris in pain on last weeks show?
 
Alexandra: I felt justified because of the amount of pain and frustration that he put me and my family through and is continuing to try and put us through. I feel like he wants what's best for himself and only himself.
 
candymom87: You said you didn't have money or health insurance when you got pregnant with the 3rd. How come you and Tony didn't go to a planned parenthood, where the cost is by your income, and get birth control and condoms?
 
Alexandra: It's my own stupidity.
 
cbenedict: My question is if you cant afford gas in your truck how are you going to afford a baby? Or afford to take care of the 2 kids you already have if you regain custody of them?
 
Alexandra: My state has great funding programs for people in my situation.
 
lisanryan: Why were you laughing when Dr. Phil was yelling at you today?
 
Alexandra: All of my other emotions are drained, that's sometimes the only one I have left. I don't remember laughing. I take what he says seriously, and I deal with it in my own way.
 
pei_jess2010: I know you are with Tony, but do you think you and Chris can get along, at least for your child?
 
Alexandra: Absolutely. I can only answer for me and my behavior, but I will do whatever it takes to maintain a pleasant relationship with healthy boundaries in regards to parenting Leilah.
 
brittanyanned: I can really relate to you. As a young mom and struggling with my family & Father of my child, I feel like you would be someone I could confide in. What do you think is the most difficult thing about balancing it all?
 
Alexandra: Having a good support network. People who lift you up and make you feel better, and give you advice. And making sure you make time for you and yourself.
 
napua17: It seems as if you mother will only accept you if she has full control of your life, how do you feel about that?
 
Alexandra: My mom wants what's best for my children and that's important … and I'm sure she wants what's best for me in her own way. She's my mom, and I value her opinion and what she says regardless of it being negative or positive.
 
sandeejsmith: Do you think you and Katherine can ever get back to being best friends?
 
Alexandra: I can only answer for myself, but I'm willing to work on it. We're not 12 and 15 anymore. With life, it makes it a little more difficult. For one, we don't play Barbies anymore and we don't live in the same house. We're both completely different people with different views on just about everything. But I will always be there for her.
 
jamle3o83: Do you have any plans in place for after this baby comes (work, school, etc)??
 
Alexandra: I would like to go and get my nursing degree and have a stable income that comes along with that career choice. I want to do what's best for my kids and I want to be happy.
 
Thanks for all the questions.
 
Chat_Moderator: Thanks to everyone who sent in questions. We tried to answer as many as we could. See you next time!