Unbearable In-Laws

November 21, 2012
Jamie says that her husband, Tardus’, family is disapproving of their relationship and won’t accept her because she is Caucasian, and they are African-American. Tardus’ family says Jamie has “whitewashed” Tardus, forced him to move away and put a wedge in their close-knit family. With Tardus stuck in the middle, will he be forced to choose between his family and the woman he loves? Tardus’ parents, Tanya and Freddie, say they'd like to find a peaceful resolution, but believe that Jamie has changed Tardus into someone they don’t recognize. Have they tried everything they can to foster a relationship with their daughter-in-law — or are they pushing her away? Then, Tardus’ brother and two sisters join the show. Can Dr. Phil bring peace to this fractured family?









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Tardus and JamieJamieTardusTanyaFreddie Jr.Tardus' Siblings Learn more about Dr. Phil's book, Life Code: The New Rules for Winning in the Real World.



In-Laws at Odds

Jamie says that her in-laws are intolerable, and she’s considering divorce. “My in-laws are so unbearable that I’m at my breaking point,” she says. “I just cannot ignore their behavior toward me anymore.” Jamie says her mother-in-law, Tanya, told Tardus that Jamie was not pretty enough. “I didn’t know why they didn’t like me, but I felt it,” she says.

“I only shared that with my son,” Tanya says of her comment.

“Jamie simply cannot meet by mother’s expectations,” Tardus says.

Jamie admits that when she and Tardus first began dating, she had concerns about his family accepting her because of their cultural differences. But she adds that she was surprised because they were initially welcome. Over time, she says, that changed.

“I think my family can be racist, but it’s not that they hate white people; they are a product of the time that they grew up in,” Tardus says.

Tardus’ stepfather, Freddie, is direct in his opposition of Jamie: “I can’t stand my daughter-in-law,” he says. He also blames her for their differences. “Jamie doesn’t accept our family because we are black.”

“Ever since Jamie has come into the picture, my brother and I have grown apart,” Tardus’ brother, Freddie Jr., says. “He’s taken on a new persona and is trying to be accepted by white America."

“Tardus needs to stand up to Jamie,” Tardus’ sister, Oreonna, says. “When Tardus met Jamie, he slowly evolved into a different person.” She describes Tardus as being “whitewashed” and an “Uncle Tom.”

Tardus says that at 31 years old, his goals are different. “I love my immediate family, but my priority is Jamie and my kids," he says.

Tardus’ parents have strong words about their daughter-in-law, Jamie. “Tardus doesn’t realize how diabolical this girl is.”

What does Jamie say happened in the hospital as she was delivering her first son? Plus, the in-laws come face to face. “I was honest; I told him that he could do better.”



Tardus’ family explains an incident that ended in Jamie hiding from them in a hotel room.

“Why is the inner-workings of their marriage any of your business?”

 

Bianca has an emotional plea to her big brother. “I want you back, Tardus. Be that guy that I looked up to.” Plus, Dr. Phil gives Tardus’ family some tough love.

Jamie says that she doesn’t trust her in-laws with her small children — but why? Then, Dr. Phil explains who he thinks can bring peace to this situation.



Dr. Phil encourages everyone to try to make peace in time for the holidays.
 
“I just want to turn this around,” Tanya says.

The family all hug at the close of the show.