A Good Marriage
After being happily married for more than 40 years, Dr. Phil shares some of his thoughts about what makes a marriage work:
- The quality of a relationship is a function of the extent to which it is built on a solid underlying friendship and meets the needs of the two people involved.
- You get what you give. When you give better, you get better.
- If you put your relationship in a win/lose situation, it will be a lose/lose situation.
- Forget whether you're right or wrong. The question is: Is what you're doing working or not working?
- There is no right or wrong way to fix a relationship. Find your own way that works. But recognize when it's not working and be honest when it needs fixing.
- Falling in love is not the same thing as being in love. Embrace the change and know that it takes work.
- You don't fix things by fixing your partner.
- Intimacy is so important because it is when we let someone else enter our private world.
- You don't necessarily solve problems. You learn how to manage them.
- Communicate. Make sure your sentences have verbs. Remember that only 7 percent of communication is verbal. Actions and non-verbal communication speak much louder.
- You teach people how to treat you. You can renegotiate the rules.