Zip Code:
  
Provider Type:
Provider:
        Listings:
          Relationships/Sex

          Dealing With Your Partner’s Past

          September 03, 2002


          Many couples face the problem of dealing with each other’s past relationships and activities. How can you resolve your feelings?

          Here’s what Dr. Phil has to say:

          • Look at your own past. Do you really have a right to judge your partner’s past?

          • Your inability to get beyond your partner’s past is your problem. Your partner didn’t necessarily do anything to you. It’s your decision if you can get beyond the past.

          • Realize that your partner was not born the day you started dating him/her. No one has a totally clean slate.

          • Accept your partner for who he/she is — both the good and the bad. Use that acceptance to create a bond that holds your relationship together.

          • If you or your partner allow your past to define either one of you, you are living up to a label, not your personal truth.

          • If you’re being judged, tell your partner: “You can either trust me or not — but get off my back!”

          • Don’t hang on to bad feelings from a past relationship. They will only infect your current relationship.

          • Define a new standard for the relationship. Commit to it together, and make a new plan for your life together.

          • Everything you do in a relationship either contributes to it or contaminates it. What is focusing on the past doing?



          Be on the Show

          Need Dr. Phil’s Help?

          Share your story for a chance to be on the show!

          Tell Us Your Story

          Be on the Show! Text “PHIL” to 88500
          Be on the Show

          Know a “Bad Bride”?

          Are you a bridesmaid under pressure to look “perfect?” Is the bride demanding that all her bridesmaids lose weight and get into shape before the big day?

          Be on the Show

          Know Someone Refusing to Act Their Age?

          Is your son or daughter a moocher and refusing to grow up? Is your loved one having a midlife crisis or wearing inappropriate clothing?

          Be on the Show

          At War with Mom?

          Do you feel she is your worst enemy? Can you not believe you are related to someone you dislike so much?

          Be on the Show

          Is a Narcissist Ruining Your Life?

          Do you suspect your partner/ family member to be a narcissist? Do they behave in a way that leaves you confused, distressed and fearful?

          Be on the Show

          Fighting Over A Family-Run Business?

          Are you part owner in a family business and feel like you don’t get your fair share of profits?

          Help & Resources

          Find Treatment Centers and Therapists!

          Check out the mental health treatment programs that have assisted Dr. Phil guests.

          Feeding America

          Learn how you can help feed a child this summer.

          Be on the Show

          Have a Story Dr. Phil Won’t Believe?

          Want to appear on Dr. Phil? Text PHIL to 88500

          Simple Share Buttons
          Simple Share Buttons