A Family Affair, Part 3: Brittany
Dr. Phil speaks with guests on all sides of infidelity.
Brittany writes:

Dear Dr. Phil,

I have been married for almost three years and found out my husband has been having an affair with a former co-worker for two of those years.

He lied to us both. He told her that I had uterine cancer and that I was on my deathbed and miraculously survived, but had a hysterectomy and so I could not have any children. I never ever had uterine cancer or a hysterectomy!

I found out about the affair when the other woman called his cell phone and I called her back. He lied to her about the status of our marriage. She was as shocked to learn the truth as I was. I just can't believe he did it. I left him immediately.

I am thankful to the other woman since I found out what kind of man he is before I had children with him!

I wish I had trusted my instincts and feel stupid I let this go on for as long as I did, but I'm a lot wiser now and want to tell women my story so they don't make the same mistakes I did.

Sincerely,
Brittany
"You had to have clues about this before you returned the phone call or you wouldn't have dialed the number," says Dr. Phil.

"We had broken up about two years ago for a short time," says Brittany, explaining that she came across a personal profile of another girl saved on his computer. "And I said, 'Who is this?' He said, 'It's a girl I went out on a date with once. I said I couldn't do it because I still loved you and nothing ever happened from that.'" But when the phone rang that day, Brittany knew who it was.

"So you called her and you guys just started comparing notes."

"We just started putting the puzzle pieces together of the missing time because there were a lot of days he would take off on me and he would take off on her and we just put it together. He was going back and forth for two years," says Brittany.
"But she knew he was married?" asks Dr. Phil. "It's just OK since you were dying?"

"He said I was dying and 'I'm just waiting for her to pull through or die,'" says Brittany.

"What a come-on line!" exclaims Dr. Phil. "Sometimes I just don't understand that people think that it's appealing when people say, 'I really want to get with you, it's just that my wife is dying and I need to wait for her to kick off. But can I have you teed up for when she does?' How can someone go, 'Oh, yes, you just swept me off of my feet, I'll meet you after the funeral'?"

"She said that he sounded sincere," laughs Brittany.

"Now, when you found this out, what did you do?"

"I left immediately," says Brittany. "If he's going to do it once, he's going to do it again, and it'll never end."
Dr. Phil asks Brittany what she thinks Kandi should do. "You think she's being way too patient and forgiving, right?"

"Oh, yes," says Brittany. "I would not be that patient even if I had kids. I would have 10 jobs and do whatever I needed to do for those kids. I would've left him in a second."

Dr. Phil turns to Kandi: "I know a lot of people have thought that you were foolish to hang on the way that you have, but I think you've made extraordinary efforts to try and salvage this relationship, to keep this family unit together for your children, for yourself, for Ed. I think you have made extraordinary efforts. But there comes a time where you say, 'I'm not going to allow the most lost person here guide this train. I'm going to make my own decisions.'"