A Family Divided: After the Confession: DrPhil.com Exclusive

DrPhil.com Exclusive
Dr. Phil answers questions from the audience after the show.
After the show, Dr. Phil answers questions from the audience. Repeating a phrase Dr. Phil often uses, one woman points out, "The best predictor of someone's future is someone's track record. I guess I'm just wondering what the tolerance threshold is to go forward with this. You've stated many times, that you teach people how to treat you. It seems to me that Erin's been teaching Marty to treat her as a victim, and somehow she enjoys it. I'm just curious how she expects to change the way she is to be treated?"

"I do say the best predictor of future behavior is relevant past behavior," Dr. Phil responds. "You do have to look at what somebody has done. Does that mean that there's no hope for Marty because he's a chronic liar and he has a history of infidelity?

Maybe. But what alters the equation is when some powerful event intervenes to cause a change of course." He points out that if a person has lied for 10 years, and then stops lying, they're building a new history, and that history will predict what's going to happen in the future.

To answer the woman's second question, Dr. Phil says, "Erin does teach people how to treat her. And one of the things she's taught [Marty] to do is treat her as an authority figure instead of a partner. She has to own that. If she lets him get away with all the lies, she's teaching him that. There are many different things that she's teaching him."

Another woman says that she doesn't understand why Erin and the girls were so upset over Marty's confession. "I feel like I've really missed something," the woman says. "I understand that [Marty] should have told his wife that he had run into the woman at the gas station, but I don't understand why that is such a big deal that they were convulsing in tears. What am I not getting?"

"I think that Erin feels that he has yet to be forthcoming with her about what happened with this woman," Dr. Phil explains. "Then when she finds out that he saw her at the gas station, they talked, she invited him over, there was a lot more to that. According to him, he didn't go. But he hid that from her." Dr. Phil points out that Erin may have been under the impression, "If you have nothing to hide, why hide it?"