Scared to Say "I Do"?"
"Curry and I have been dating for over three years. I want to be married, but he will not pop the question. He won't commit. I tell Curry, ‘Either commit, quit or hit the road, Jack, and don't you come back,'" Josie declares. "I do not want to waste five or 10 years. My time clock is ticking. He tells he can't live without me, he loves me a lot, but what's the problem? I don't understand. I'm going to leave him; I'm not going to put up with this anymore. I'm done."
"What's my problem? Why can't I commit?" Curry asks. "Josie is the whole package. She's marriage material. She's smoking hot! I'm sure there are three guys waiting behind me right now, willing to jump at the chance."
[AD]Curry lists several reasons that keep him from popping the question. "Reason number one: I've been married and divorced before. I've been burned. I do not want it to happen again. Reason number two: I'm taking on the responsibilities of another person's livelihood. It's a little bit scary to me," Curry says with a chuckle. "Reason number three: things are great now, but what happens after we get married? What if things change? I've seen it happen before in my last marriage. I don't want that to happen again. If something doesn't change soon, she's going to dump me."
Josie and Curry join Dr. Phil onstage. The walkway is strewn with pink and red rose petals.
"Sounds like, to me, you are in big trouble," Dr. Phil says to Curry.
"I am in big trouble," Curry admits.
Addressing Josie, Dr. Phil asks, "Why have you sat around for three years waiting for him to get it in gear?"
"I thought I'd give him a break, but that's been a long break," she says with a laugh.
"What is it about her that just doesn't do it for you?" Dr. Phil asks Curry.
"It's nothing about her that doesn't do it for me, believe me?"
"I don't believe you," Dr. Phil counters. "If she was the right one for you, you would think you would [propose], right?"
"Logically, I suppose."
"Do you think she's a nice person? Do you think she a sweetheart? Is she kind? Does she do things for you? Do you love her? Do you think she's attractive?" Dr. Phil probes.
[AD]Curry answers in the affirmative to each query.
"So, basically, if you marry her, you'd be marrying way over your head," Dr. Phil observes wryly.
"Things have been great. We have a great time together. She rides on the back of the motorcycle with me. We go hiking," Curry says. "She's got her place. I have my place. We get together, and things are good. But then the economy hit, and I got laid off. Times are tough." Curry tells Dr. Phil that he had to move out of state, so he and Josie have a long-distance relationship. He also says the issues he faced in his previous marriage are holding him back.
Gesturing to the rose petals on the floor, Dr. Phil says, "I didn't bring you here today to force this." He turns to Josie. "You don't want to force him into it, right?"
"No," she answers. "I love him, I care about him, he means everything to me."
"Y'all aren't living together because you feel that's not the right thing to do?" Dr. Phil inquires.
[AD]"I feel it's not right to live together; it's just my belief," Josie replies. "It doesn't work for me. I feel he has to be married to me."
Turning to Curry, Dr. Phil says, "Would you miss her really bad if she rode off into the sunset with somebody who could make a decision?"
"Yeah. That would definitely break my heart," Curry replies. He tells Dr. Phil that he still feels scarred from his failed marriage.
Dr. Phil explains how Curry can manage the tapes he has in his head about marriage.
Should Curry commit or quit? Vote now!
"If you have to track him down like a cheetah on a gazelle, I guarantee you, women are thinking, ‘If he wants you, he'd better come get you,'" Dr. Phil tells Josie.
"I get to a point right now [where] I'm done. There are plenty of other guys around," Josie declares.
"You need to know, it's not you," Curry tells his girlfriend. "You are enough for me. Honestly, and I'm taking all this in."
"I want to see a ring on my finger soon or goodbye," Josie says. "I am done. I'm just telling you how I feel. Three and ½ years. It's enough."
[AD]Dr. Phil says that Curry is at a crisis in his relationship. "Are you going to let her inspire you, or are you going to let [your ex-wife] control you?" he asks.
"I think I'm going to take the first part," he replies.
"Are you going to marry this girl?" Dr. Phil inquires.
"You're trying to get me to do this on national TV?" Curry says with a nervous laugh.
"No, I'm not. Forget the rose petals," Dr. Phil asks. "I'm not trying to trap you into something here at all. But I want you to know that she feels like she has put up enough, and it's time for you to match it or walk."