For Better Or Worse: All Guests

For Better Or Worse: All Guests
Dr. Phil talks to husbands and wives who can't stand their spouse's worst behaviors.
Lillian and Mauricio
Lillian has been married to her husband Mauricio for five years. She admits she sought revenge after she suspected that her husband had an affair during a trip to Mexico.

"I'm so angry," says Lillian. "The only way to get back at him isto spend money." She forged Mauricio's signature in order to get a credit card and maxed it out. Then when he gave her money to pay their taxes, she blew it on a spending spree and lied about it.
Mauricio insists that he didn't have an affair in Mexico and that the phone call from a woman which led to the suspicions was a practical joke.

When asked about Lillian's behavior with regard to their finances, Mauricio responds, "She's the worst liar I've ever met in my life. If she doesn't stop, I'll divorce her. How can I learn to trust her when she's lied to me and betrayed me? I don't know why she's sabotaging our future together."
"You can change this," Dr. Phil tells George. "There are several theories about why this is going on. It could be a nervous tick that calms you down due to the repetitive nature of it. Another theory is that it's a habit and the habit has just continued. The theories go downhill from there. If you acknowledge that this is change worthy behavior, you can stop it. It really can be that simple. Is she worth the trouble of trading in your habit of chewing on a bottle cap in order to be able to kiss your wife?"

"Absolutely," says George.
Lillian and Mauricio Follow-Up
Dr. Phil asks Lillian and Mauricio to return to the stage and asks, "What have you been thinking about since you were up here a few minutes ago?"

"That I've jeopardized my family's well-being by doing these things and I don't want that," says Lillian. "I'm not just hurting him. I'm hurting my kids too."

"I don't think she trusts men at all," says Mauricio. "I love her very much and will do whatever it takes to repair the relationship."
Dr. Phil asks Lillian and Mauricio to face one another.

"It's been a long time since you've seen the person you married," says Dr. Phil. "All you've seen are the problems. You need to decide you have a higher calling in this life than to play these games and decide that you will do what it takes to make this work."

"I don't care where the bottom is," says Mauricio. "I will do what it takes to get us through this, because I love you."

"I don't want any more revenge," says Lillian. "I want to put our family back together. I love you."
"Are you out for revenge?" asks Dr. Phil. "Or is that just an excuse to justify your behavior after the fact?"

"I don't know," says Lillian.

"You understand that Mauricio has said that if you tell another lie, he's filing for divorce?"

"Yes," answers Lillian.

"Well, there are other lies," says Dr. Phil. "But you have a family. You need to be honest with each other. Then, decide to either forgive each other and work through your problems, or go your separate ways. You have children who will pick up the tab for your ridiculous behavior and you don't have the right to do that."

"If you're upset, you need to do what it takes to get over it," Dr. Phil tells Lillian. "You can say you don't know why you do it. But I don't really care why you do it. You just need to stop."
Jenni and Brad
Married less than two years, Jenni says that she is afraid to be in the same room as her husband Brad when he watches sports because he turns into a monster. "He's a different person when he watches his games," says Jenni. "In the middle of his rage, he screams and our neighbors think he's beating me."

"I get irked when the referee makes calls that I don't agree with," admits Brad.
"You're either (a) an immature wannabe and living vicariously through these sports teams," says Dr. Phil. "Or (b), this has nothing to do with sports. Of those two, what's your choice?" asks Dr. Phil.

"I tend to think it has nothing to do with sports," says Brad.

"In Self Matters, I ask people to identify 10 defining moments. Those are moments that changed you in a defining way. After that moment happened, you were a different person. It's important to identify those because when you do, you can say, 'I now know why I do what I do. I now know that I need to deal with what I need to deal with,'" explains Dr. Phil.
"Tell me a defining moment in your life that changed who you were that may well affect who sits there today and who rages on a Saturday afternoon," Dr. Phil instructs Brad.

Brad recounts a tragic incident that occurred when his two-and-a-half-year-old nephew was killed when Brad's car backed into him. Although it was clearly an accident (Brad moved the toddler out of the way but the child ran back into the driveway as Brad was backing out), Brad still feels responsible and carries guilt over the incident.

"It seemed like a nightmare that would never end," says Brad.
"That is a life-altering experience," says Dr. Phil. "Just below the surface, there is pain and frustration. Maybe you have found a way to rage against the injustices in life by raging against the unfairness you perceive in sporting games. Is it possible that that unfairness [you feel] is really about what you've had to carry as a burden in your life?"

"Yes," says Brad. "I believe that contributes a lot to it."

"I know that you know on an intellectual level that you did all the right things. You weren't being reckless or careless. But you also know the boy is dead and that you were at the wheel. One of the things you have to do, that Self Matters will lead you to, is forgive yourself. You have to believe what you know intellectually and forgive yourself."
Tricia and George
After only five months of marriage, Tricia won't kiss her husband because of the things he puts in his mouth. "He is the most wonderful man," says Tricia. "But ... it didn't dawn on me until after we got married that I married a dog! He has the worst oral fixation I have ever seen! He will chew on anything and everything. I never noticed these habits while we were dating."

"My wife doesn't let me kiss her because she noticed I chew on my toenails after I cut them," says George. "Women just don't understand. It's a guy thing. I know it bothers her. It just doesn't bother me."

"First off, that's not a guy thing," says Dr. Phil. "That's a bear thing!"
"Why does it not matter to you?" Dr. Phil asks George. "It obviously bothers your wife."

"I honestly don't realize I'm doing it or that it bothers her that much," says George.

"He has something in his mouth right now!" says Tricia.

George admits to Dr. Phil that he is chewing on a straw because he's nervous.

Tricia tries to explain how bad George's chewing has become by recalling an incident in which he "Cut his toenails, actually picked one up, put it in his mouth, and savored it."

"That is way too much information!" says Dr. Phil.

"I do it within the confines on my home," says George.

"You're on national television chewing on a straw!" exclaims Dr. Phil.
"If you're chewing on something that is non-nutritious, it means there is some motivation for it," says Dr. Phil.

"He bites on me too," says Tricia. "My arms, hands and fingers. If we're in bed, he'll bite my arm. I told him, 'no biting!'"

"I have a new theory," Dr. Phil tells George. "Are you a dog?"

"I've stopped biting her," says George.

"Why did you bite her?" asks Dr. Phil. "Do I want to know this?"

"I don't know," says George. "A show of affection? I wasn't trying to eat her or anything."