'Is My Son is a Sexual Predator?'
Dr. Phil has advice for learning to bond with a child you don't like.

"My wife and I feel that our son, Mikai, is a sexual predator," says Brad of his 19-year-old son. "He has another life that we really don't know anything about because he is so good at hiding the truth."

 

"He is so obsessed with sex," says Kenda. "He has no boundaries, no sense of, 'This girl is too young.' He will go after anybody who will give him a piece." Mikai has been looking at porn Web sites since he was 14, and has reportedly had sexual contact with girls he has met online. He's been caught viewing porn on the computer at the library. Brad recently received a phone call from an angry father who said Mikai was having phone sex with

his 13-year-old daughter, and Mikai has also been accused of making girls touch him inappropriately.

 

 "I think he's in contact with as many girls as he can to fulfill whatever desires he has sexually," says Brad.

 

Brad and Kenda's younger sons have complained that Mikai has tried to grope some of their friends. And when Mikai dropped out of school last year, the school counselor said that there were complaints against him for deviant sexual behavior.

 

Brad and Kenda have turned off the long distance on their home phone because Mikai ran up huge phone bills to sex hotlines, and they have restricted Internet access in their home. "He is holding us hostage in our own home," a frustrated Kenda explains.

Mikai also has been caught lying, stealing and he gets aggressive when things don't go his way. "Yelling, screaming, swearing. We do have a few holes in the wall and kicked in doors," explains Kenda.

 

Brad and Kenda are particularly worried about the safety of their 4-year-old daughter. About three years ago, they discovered her private parts were red and inflamed after Mikai had babysat

for her. When they confronted Mikai about it, he denied it. "As a mom, I don't want to think my son would ever hurt his little sister," says Kenda. "I think that this is an illness."

 

Recently Mikai told Brad and Kenda that he was molested when he was growing up. "I know a lot about Mikai's pain," admits Kenda, noting that both she and her husband were molested as children. "I vowed that I would never put my children through the crap that I went through as a child, but somebody invaded my circle and abused my son. And now I fear he's on the path of being a predator because of what happened to him when he was little."

 

Brad and Kenda have tried every avenue they can think of, and after exhausting all possibilities for help in finding out the truth, they turn to Dr. Phil. "My wife and I don't know what to do for Mikai anymore," Brad confesses. "My fear is to have the phone ring and someone on the other line tell me that my son has raped them, that he is the sex offender, that pedophile, that horrible monster that I fear," says Kenda.

Dr. Phil talks with Brad and Kenda before bringing Mikai and his brothers onstage. "You said that this was your last hope, that you had nowhere else to turn," he says.


"That's exactly where I am," says Kenda, explaining that she and Brad have seen red flags in Mikai's behavior for several years. They have tried to get him help, but have been told that until Mikai has a victim, nothing can be done. Kenda doesn't want to wait for Mikai to land in jail.

 

"If you are convinced that this is what's going on, if you truly believe this, how could you allow him to spend one minute of one hour of one day with access to your daughter?" Dr. Phil asks. Kenda says they don't, but Dr. Phil gives examples. "You have said he has locked himself in the bathroom with her when you're not there, which means you have left him there with her when you're gone." Noting that both Kenda and Brad have been victimized by molestation, Dr. Phil asks, "If you really believe this in the core of your heart, how can you allow him to have access to this little girl?"

 

"I don't know if I believe it that deeply," Brad says.

 

"Let me stop you right there," Dr. Phil interjects. "You need to believe it deeply. You're on national television saying your son is a sexual predator and if you don't truly believe this, we need to stop this."

Kenda admits that they may be in denial, but says they do have rules like no longer allowing Mikai to be home alone with his

sister, which they call the "two-brother rule."

 

Dr. Phil asks Kenda and Brad to carefully watch a video that shows Mikai playing with his sister, with his hand up her dress. "That is very disturbing to me, and we shot it the last few days," Dr. Phil explains. "I don't know whether there's

anything inappropriate there, but I know, given the backdrop of this situation, that's not even almost OK. Do you agree?"

 

"That's disturbing," Brad replies.

 

"Horrifying," Kenda agrees.

"The reason I'm pointing that out now is because you're saying,'Well, we're kind of in denial but we put in some safeguards,'" Dr. Phil reminds them. "If you have these good faith beliefs, then you can't be in denial. It is your job to stand in the gap and protect every single one of your children, particularly that precious young girl who cannot protect herself."

Dr. Phil looks to Kenda. "What would it have meant to you in your life, when men were lined up outside your bedroom door to abuse you, to have had a parent that stepped up and said, 'No, I'm here to

rescue you. No one is going to hurt or touch you'?"

 

"It would have meant that I had self-worth. That my protector loved and cared about me, and that I was somebody important," Kenda says.

 

"Isn't that what [your daughter] needs to know now?" Dr. Phil continues.

 

"Yes, and after seeing that clip, there's no more doubt," Kenda comments. "I'm not in denial. I think I was in a protective mode because not only do I love Mikai, I also love [my daughter]."