"There are very few, what I call, drop-dead deal-breakers in a relationship," Dr. Phil says. "Abuse is one of them, and you don't have to punch somebody, slap somebody, choke somebody to be abusive. You can do any number of things that are short of hitting them or slapping them." He asks Deborah why she embellished the story when she told police about Todd's actions.
"When you've gone through as much as I'd gone through up to that point," she says, "everyone has their breaking point, and you feel so broken down and so, just, you know, shattered, that you reach that wall."
"Did you want him to spend 10 months in jail?" Dr. Phil asks.
"No," she replies.
[AD]"This is a clear example of the domestic violence act being used as a sword instead of shield, and that dilutes the domestic violence statutes, and it should not be tolerated. This was abused," Anthony says.
"I agree that the lying is unconscionable. It's indefensible, but I also believe that, had there been a vocabulary where being pushed up against a wall and being thrown to the floor was actually recognized as domestic violence " " Gina begins.
"It is," Anthony says.
"But for whatever reason, Deborah didn't feel as if that would be sufficient," Gina continues. "Anthony and I, for once, are on the same side, because this has to be protected."
"Have you been physically abusive with this woman during your relationship?" Dr. Phil asks Todd.
Todd explains the events of the night. "She was blocking the door to the spare bedroom, where I wanted to go in and get my clothes," he says. "She was blocking the door, and I took my shoulder " I never touched her with my hands, pushed her with my hands. I never threw her on the floor. That did not happen, but I did push through the door with my shoulder. But as far as being physical and throwing her down and throwing her around the house, none of that happened, and if any of that would've happened, there would've been an arrest made that night."
[AD]"Were you being physical with him?" Dr. Phil asks Deborah.
"I was. We were both pulling, and pushing and grabbing each other," she says.
"No, she grabbed me. She had my arms, she clawed at my arms, and I asked her to get off," Todd says.
"Do you want revenge?" Dr. Phil asks Todd.
"Not physical," he says. "But part of me, yeah."
"Do you want revenge on her now, or are you willing to move forward and put this behind you?" Dr. Phil asks Todd.
"In order for our marriage to work, we're going to have to put it behind us," he says.
"This marriage is not going to work," Dr. Phil tells him. "You all have a toxic dynamic here. You have no business being married. You're going to hurt one another, or something bad is going to happen here. If you two want to be married, you've got a lot of work to do before you start playing house."
Dr. Phil asks Deborah why she wants to be involved with Todd after the way she described him earlier. "You could go out on Melrose and stop the first car by and have a better relationship at random, than what you all have here," he says. "You are toxic for one another. Maybe you're just toxic for everybody that you're with. I don't know that. You're an attractive, intelligent, healthy woman. You're an attractive, intelligent, healthy guy. Both of you deserve to live with peace and harmony and have a soft place to fall when you come home, not in this chaotic mess. For God's sake, there are times when you need to just fold up your tent and move on down the road, and this is one of them."
[AD]At the end of the show, Dr. Phil addresses Todd and Deborah, "You guys have said that you do want to investigate the possibility of remaining together."
"Yes, sir," Todd replies.
"And you agree with me that it's currently toxic, it's currently dysfunctional, and there's going to have to be a monumental shift in this situation," Dr. Phil says. He offers to provide the couple with resources to work on their marriage.