Wifestyles: Grant and Kelly

Wifestyles: Grant and Kelly

"Grant wants a perfect house, awesome dinners, a hot, sexy wife," explains Kelly. "Grant complains about how I do laundry, how I keep the pantry, how I put the pots and pans away. We disagree over where the kitchen

table should be." After seven years of marriage and three children, Kelly is tired of trying to fit her husband's standards of the "perfect wife."


Grant also wants her to dress sexier. "If Grant could dress me, I would be wearing a short skirt, a tight shirt, and

high heels. Grant would love to see me go wash his truck in a swimsuit, preferably a small one," she says. He's also suggested plastic surgery. "Grant would like bigger breasts. I will not get breast implants," says Kelly.


Grant even has a grading system for her meals, which doesn't exactly motivate Kelly. "If I'm just going to get a ‘C,' why bother?" she asks.


"My wife is desperately in need of wife lessons," says Grant. "I do have high expectations and standards, and I expect them to be met. I think every guy would like their wife to be a Stepford Wife."


About his wife's sex appeal, he says, "I've always wanted Kelly to meet me at

the front door in a French maid's outfit. I'd love to see Kelly in a pair of Daisy Dukes. I've asked my wife if she would be interested in getting breast implants. She didn't turn me down flat, so there could be hope," he says. "My greatest fear is settling for a mediocre marriage. I feel like our marriage is only 75 percent of its potential."


Kelly is tired of feeling like a failure. "Grant treats me like I'm stupid. The pressure to be the wife Grant wants is overwhelming. It crushes me when Grant says that he's not satisfied. I work very hard all day long not to be mediocre. My biggest fear for our marriage is that I'm never going to be good enough. I think your husband is supposed to think you're great. And I don't have a husband who thinks I'm great," she says, her eyes filling with tears.


She turns to Dr. Phil. "My husband constantly criticizes my clothing, my cooking, my housekeeping, and me. I'm tired of the pressure of trying to be the perfect wife."


Dr. Phil asks Kelly, "Has he broken your spirit?"

"Yes," she says. "Sometimes I feel like if I compromise, or if I am flexible, that it's not enough. I feel like he pushes into that give on my part, and it's not appreciated. I feel like if I make a 30 percent improvement, he then pushes for the other 70 right away. And so sometimes I do just put up a wall."

"How's that working for you?" Dr. Phil asks Grant.

"We've made a lot of progress to get where we're at right now," says Grant. "And we need some help in continuing with that progress. Right now we're kind of at a stalemate. We disagree on some things, and we're looking to make some changes to get …"


"Well, the operative word I just heard you say was ‘we,'" points out Dr. Phil. "‘We' need some help. Do you mean that or do you mean ‘she' needs some help? Because I read your letter, and you said you're going to bring her down here and hope that I can get her some wife classes and get her straightened up. You said, ‘Everybody wants a Stepford Wife,' including you. And by a Stepford Wife, you mean a robot that is programmed to do exactly what you want, when you want it, right?"


"Well, that's pretty close," says Grant, laughing. 

"You said you're scared that this is as good as it gets. And that's not good enough," says Dr. Phil. 


Grant nods yes.


He turns to Kelly. "He wants you to get Glamour Shots made. He wants you to have long nails, get breast implants, and look like one of the desperate housewives."

Grant explains that he wants Kelly to dress more her age. "I kind of like her to dress a little bit younger, like she's her age. She likes to go shopping with her mom and I think they buy the same clothes sometimes."

"OK, so you're here not only to alienate your wife, but your mother-in-law. You couldn't dig a bigger hole if I'd brought you a backhoe out here!" exclaims Dr. Phil.