Adoption Scams, Part 1: Crissy and Melissa

Sense out of Nonsense?

Dr. Phil sits down with Crissy and Melissa in his green room. He introduces the two women and asks Crissy what she wants to say. She addresses Melissa.

"When you confessed to me, you told me that you were sorry that you did it. You said that you had a drug problem, and you told me that you got sober. What happened? What changed between your feeling remorse for me and then forgetting it and going forward, and now there sits Marie in the same situation I was in almost four years ago."

"Selfishness," Melissa says softly. "Fulfilling my own needs and not caring about anybody else's."

"But when you were doing it, you knew how it tore me up," Crissy says. Melissa agrees. "Was I the first? Who was before me?"

Melissa admits, "There were a few at the same time as you."

"A year before? Two years before?" asks Crissy.

"No, the very same time," she says.

"Yeah, but what about Marie?" Crissy asks. "You felt remorse for me, so did you feel the guilt when you were doing this to Marie?"

"No," Melissa says.

"No?" Crissy asks. "I don't understand that."

"I don't either," says Melissa.

Crissy continues, "I mean, you had her believing that there was a baby, and she was coming to get it. Were you going to tell her that the baby died the same way you did me?"

"I had not thought it through, thought it out, thought it to the end," says Melissa.

 

"Is that what you always did, the baby died?"

"No."

"That was just special for me?"

"No," says Melissa. "There was one other one whom I told that to."

 

"When you said the baby died, how come you couldn't just say, 'The baby died,' or 'I changed my mind,' or " you said that the baby died and that you saw it, that you delivered it." Crissy holds back tears as she speaks. "You said the skin was kind of see-through or something like that. I think you said that you were sending the ashes. What makes you go that extra step?"

Melissa says, "I didn't want to hurt you. I never wanted to hurt you."

"But you did," Crissy practically whispers.

"I did," says Melissa. "And I'm sorry for that."

 

"Do you know, for the last four years I haven't even been able to think about adopting?" Crissy asks, tearfully. "I shut myself off. I didn't talk to friends, I didn't go places, I just refused phone calls, I just didn't talk to anybody. The first time I discussed this whole situation was with the producer just a few days ago."

Crissy continues, "You broke something in me, and I don't know how to get that back. And you said you came here because of me, because you wanted to give me something."

"Yes," says Melissa.

"What?" asks Dr. Phil. "What is it you want to give her?"

"An apology," says Melissa. "A face-to-face apology. She deserves so much more than that, but that's what I can offer."

"Well, then do something for me," Crissy pleads. "Don't let Marie spend the next four years the way that I was. Go out there " I'll go with you " but go out there and at least give her an opportunity to get some sort of healing because that's not fair. That's not fair that you can show compassion to me and not show compassion to them. If you want to do something for me then go out there."

Melissa says, "I showed you compassion because you showed me compassion, however little I deserved it. The conversation that we had two years ago started out with you saying, 'I will not attack you. I just want answers.'"

Crissy points out that a year had passed since Melissa's ruse ended when they had that conversation. "[Marie's] had three months. She's got anger inside of her that " I had had enough time for it to be eased, and she hasn't."

 

With emotions still running high, Dr. Phil keeps the conversation going. Will Melissa give Jen and Marie a chance to look her in the eye? Find out tomorrow.