Intervention: Saving Jaime: Kim, Rudy, Chris

Drug-Fueled Rage

Kim says since about ninth grade, Jaime has been using OxyContin, cocaine, Percocet, marijuana and crack. "I could see, by Jaime's arms, she had bruises from her shoulders down to her wrists. It looked like she had been injecting in the same spot. When I saw that the first time, I almost fell to the floor. It became very real, and I knew it was bad," Kim says.

"Growing up with Jaime, we were very close," says Jaime's 15-year-old brother, Chris. "She was like a second mom to me. I always looked up to her. She was one of the most important people in my life. I haven't talked to her in a few months, because her problem really started to escalate, and my mom was trying to protect me."

"She was a complete tyrant. She just wasn't Jaime anymore," Kim says, holding back her tears. "When you looked into her eyes, it wasn't her. She wasn't herself. You couldn't talk to her, you couldn't communicate."

 

"Jaime's drug abuse has affected Kim in many ways," says Jaime's stepfather, Rudy. "She doesn't get a lot of sleep at night. Every time the phone rings, she's afraid to answer it. She's afraid to walk in and find her daughter dead."

[AD]"When Jaime first told me she was addicted, my family and I did an intervention," Kim says. "We got her into detox. She stayed there for three hours and checked herself out. She ran, and that night, she attempted suicide. The police found Jaime laying on her kitchen floor." Kim cries, "I thought my daughter was going to die. She was foaming at the mouth. You never envision seeing your daughter like that. This is the end of the road for her. I can see it, I feel it, I know it's coming, and I've got to save my daughter."

 

After seeing Brandon and Dr. Phil intervene with Karli, Kim wrote in for help. 

Brandon and Debbie meet the key family members who will be present during Jaime's intervention and go over the lifesaving plan. "If we see that she's escalating, or it gets dangerous for her, for anyone of you or for us, we stop the process," Debbie says. "I do need someone to be responsible to call 911 if it gets to a dangerous situation."

"We don't know how out of control she's going to be," Brandon says. "I can't restrain her."

Kim calls Jaime and leaves a voicemail, asking to spend the day with her.

Brandon follows Kim as she drives to Jaime's apartment to pick her up and bring her back to her house, where the family will be waiting to perform the intervention. Jaime and her boyfriend get into Kim's vehicle, and as they drive by Brandon, Kim flashes him a discreet thumbs up.

When they arrive at Kim's house, Jaime immediately tries to run, and her little brother wrestles her to the ground.

Police are called to de-escalate Jaime's drug-fueled rage.

 

Brandon tries to talk Jaime into listening to her family, but she refuses.

"Are you going to sit and listen?" Brandon asks.

[AD]"No! No," she says defiantly.

"All we're asking you to do " "

"I don't care what you're asking me to do! I'm asking you to leave me alone," she says.

"I'm sorry," Kim says from the background.

"You're sorry, Kimberly?" Jaime asks her mother. "This is the last time you will ever see me," she says vehemently.

Brandon continues to plead with Jaime to listen to her family. She screams back, saying she wants to go home.

Debbie approaches, introducing herself, but Jaime won't hear it.

"I can't believe you embarrassed me in front of Luke like this," Jaime says, referring to her boyfriend.

Jaime tries to leave, and her temper explodes.

 

[AD]After police arrive, Jaime is handcuffed and put into a police car. An ambulance is called to assess the young woman, and she is taken to the hospital for a medical evaluation.

Kim and the family go to the hospital to plead with Jaime's doctor to keep her under observation for 72 hours before releasing her. At the hospital, they are informed that Jaime will be held for 24 hours and will receive a psychiatric evaluation. Brandon hopes Jaime will agree to treatment at La Hacienda the following day.

Dr. Phil draws a comparison of Jaime's rage to Brandon's seven years ago, when he was caught on tape in a drug-fueled fight with his mother. Brandon agrees that he was just like Jaime.

"This behavior is not atypical in any way," Dr. Phil says. "This is a very common pattern, when a drug addict realizes, ‘Wait a minute. Somebody is getting ready to threaten my access to drugs. Somebody is getting ready to threaten my ability to do what I've been doing.'"

Dr. Phil tells Kim what bothered him during the intervention. "In this intervention, we have Debbie and Brandon, who are there on my behalf, who bring an expertise, and it's clear they did, and you've got a 15-year-old son over here who is taking the lead in this, almost as a parent, trying to contain his older sister, and you're standing in the background, apologizing. You say you feel guilty. If you feel guilty about having done something wrong, wouldn't this be the time to step up and do something right?" he asks her.

"I'm afraid of Jaime," she explains. "I was afraid of her reaction. I felt that if this doesn't work, she's never going to speak to me again."

[AD]"If this doesn't work, she'll never speak to you again because she won't be able to," Dr. Phil says. "This isn't even almost over. You've got to plug in here. You can screw this up big time if we don't get some clarity about what's going on here."

Dr. Phil explains that Debbie was right to have someone call 911. He acknowledges Jaime's brother, Chris, for trying to contain his sister, but says that's not a job for a 15-year-old. "You were passive in this, and you can't be passive in this, Kim," Dr. Phil says.

She nods and agrees. "I have to learn," she says.

Dr. Phil drills down on Kim's enabling behavior.

 

Debbie also struggled with enabling Brandon's addiction, until she learned how to do what's best for her son. "Brandon, how important was it that your mother finally stood up and said, ‘That's enough'?" Dr. Phil asks.

"It was huge. I mean, she was the biggest enabler in the world for me," he tells Kim. "It was when she got better, that I got better."

"Here's my point: If we get her to treatment, if she turns things around, if she doesn't continue down the path that she's on, and she comes back to the same dynamic that she has now, what's the point?" Dr. Phil asks. He tells Kim she needs to get over her guilt, forgive herself, ask for Jaime's forgiveness, and then give Jaime a chance at life. "Don't sabotage her when she's 2, 3, 4, all the way up through her teens and then sabotage her now … Don't you wish you had that childhood to do over again?"

"Oh, yeah," she says.

"You get a do-over right now. This is when you re-parent, this is when you redo. This is your chance to be the mother you feel you should have been then," he says. "I'm asking you to power up."

[AD]Debbie relates. She had to leave Brandon in jail for six months to keep him safe. Debbie says she went to Al-Anon meetings and got her own team of sponsors to help her when she needed strength.

Brandon says his mother didn't even know he was doing black tar heroin until after she refused to bail him out. He told her the truth because he left drugs in her vehicle. "If she would've bailed me out, I would've been out, I would've been doing drugs that were in the car, and I could've died that day," he says.