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          Not-So-Sweet 16: "My Daughter's Dangerous Sex Life"

          August 06, 2014

          Fany and her husband, Markus, say they’re at their wits’ end with Fany’s 16-year-old daughter, Claire, who admittedly drinks, smokes marijuana and has sex with numerous partners. Dr. Phil has some tough questions for the teen about her choices — and for Fany and Markus about their parenting. How can Claire get back on track? This show contains strong sexual content. Viewer discretion advised.

          Not-So-Sweet 16

          Fany says she has no idea how to control her 16-year-old daughter, Claire, who she says is a promiscuous party girl. Fany says Claire recently even participated in an orgy at a party, which Fany found out about when graphic photos — and then a video — surfaced online. “It’s tough as a parent to come to the realization that you have no control over what could happen,” Fany says. “She feels like she’s invincible.”

          Fany’s husband, Markus, says he came into the family when Claire was about 12, at which time Fany entered into a two-and-a-half year custody battle. “Claire completely went wild,” he says.

          “This is a dramatically maladjusted young woman, in my view, for this to be OK,” Dr. Phil tells the parents. “One thing that has to happen, on an immediate basis, is we have to suppress this behavior. You also have to figure out why this is happening — why this OK with her.”

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          Dr. Phil reviews a timeline of some of Claire’s bad behaviors.

          Claire’s Perspective

          Claire admits that her partying and promiscuity have earned her “a reputation” among her peers. But she says she doesn’t think sex is a bad thing, and she admits she has even traded sex for alcohol and marijuana. Claire says her mother found a list she made of the guys she had slept with and “took the liberty of messaging every single one,” which only made her want to rebel more.

          Claire recalls the night of the orgy, saying she had smoked three grams of pot and chugged half a bottle of rum. She says she went into a bedroom with one guy, intending to have sex with only him, but then two other guys joined in. “I don’t really remember much,” Claire says. Still, she insists, “It was consensual. I was really messed up, but it wasn’t, like, rape.”

          “Tell me what you think the difference is between attention and exploitation.”

          “In order to give consent, you have to be of age and capacity. If you have diminished capacity, then you don’t have the ability to give consent.”

          Claire reveals a source of pain from her past.

          Dr. Phil drills down on the parents: “Whatever her choices are, they’re leading to consequences beyond her coping skills.”

          Words of Warning

          When Layla appeared on the show three years ago, she was a self-proclaimed party girl who said she loved having fun and being sexy. She said drinking made her brave, witty and outgoing. She liked getting up on the table and dancing with friends, because guys paid attention to her. Layla had wrecked four cars while drunk driving, but she said partying at 20 years old was “normal.”

          “Claire’s story scares me more than mine.” What message does Layla have for Claire?

          Dr. Phil introduces Dr. Matthew Polachek from the Center for Discovery, a residential treatment facility that provides specialized, therapeutic programs for women and teens.

          “We have to find you,” Matthew tells Claire. “We have to discover you, and empower you and build your self-esteem and your identity. This is an opportunity for you to focus on you and get away from the drama with school, the issues with mom and dad.”

          Claire and her parents accept the help.

          Phil in the Blanks – The Podcast

          Related Resource

          • Doctor on Demand was created by Doctor on Demand Inc., which is owned in part by Dr. Phillip C. McGraw.

          Special Thanks

          • Dr. Matthew Polachek

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