Courtney, 20, and her 23-year-old boyfriend, Ryan, met on a dating app a year ago and Courtney recently gave birth to their daughter. But their relationship has had its share of strife, including cheating and lying about an abortion. Courtney wrote to Dr. Phil for help making their relationship work, especially for the sake of their daughter. 

 

“Right now, the two of you are behaving in a very immature fashion,” Dr. Phil tells the couple.

 

He suggests they start pre-marital counseling to determine if there’s a future for them. “You’re going to talk about things that involve goals, the definition of a relationship, what emotional integrity means, such things as division of labor, whose responsible for what. You’re going to talk about things like religion, expectations for the marriage, family values. You’re going to talk about conflict resolution. You’re going to talk about in-laws, and boundaries and barriers,” Dr. Phil says. “If you learn these things and expect them to come up, then you can be prepared to deal with them.”

 

He adds that once they go through the counseling and learn what their values are, then they can then decide if they want to spend the rest of their lives together, or just develop a co-parenting relationship. 

 

“That’s what you really need to discover,” he tells them.