John claims he’s fought the urge to torture, dismember and kill others since the age of 12, and says he’s fantasized about keeping what he calls “safe friends” with him since he was 16.

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“A safe friend is somebody who can’t leave or betray you because you have them always. You could watch them. Unfortunately, to do that you’d have to end their life,” he explains.

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“To mitigate the urge, I started to collect random shrunken heads and replica human faces,” says John. He claims having these objects around him gave him “a sense of peace,” and the tranquility “that comes with permanent friendships.”

In the video above, John claims he once attempted to lure a real-life “safe friend,” into his home, but says, “Eventually, I scared her away.”

On Wednesday’s Dr. Phil, John, who says he has never actually killed anyone himself, explains how he eventually came to the attention of convicted serial killer, Arthur Shawcross (also known as the Genesee River Killer), and has written a book about their subsequent correspondence.

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Author On Friendship With Convicted Serial Killer Arthur Shawcross: ‘He Was Basically My Closest Friend For A While’