Tatum says the last time she felt peace was when she was 10 years old. She says at 11, shortly after her baby brother died, her mom chose a life of drugs over her and eventually ended up in jail. The now 14-year-old says that before that, her mom had been in-and-out of her life, but at this time, her mom wasn’t there when she really needed her.

TELL DR. PHIL YOUR STORY: Betrayed by a loved one?

Tatum admits that she’s full of anger, acts out and is now living in a juvenile detention facility for violating probation.

Dr. Phil reviews some of the traumatic experiences Tatum has suffered in her short life and tells her, “I don’t ask myself why you’re reaching, scrambling around, trying to figure out a way to exist and protect yourself; I ask myself why not, because you say, ‘I don’t want anybody to get close because when people get close, I wind up getting hurt.’”

WATCH: 14-Year-Old’s Message To Mom: ‘I Will Do Whatever I Can Not To Be Like You … You’re A Shame’

He continues, “The system has failed you, your family has failed you, and I’m sorry.”

This episode of Dr. Phil airs Thursday. Watch more here.

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Today’s Takeaway: Separate The Behavior From The Individual