Alana has been accused by her son-in-law, Danny, of effectively trying to sabotage his marriage to Nicole by monopolizing all her daughter’s time. Danny and Nicole have been married a year, but he says Nicole spends most of her time with her mother, leaving him alone to care for the couple’s young daughter. TELL DR. PHIL YOUR STORY: Huge family drama?
In the video above, Alana says she and Nicole have always been close but admits the relationship might not be healthy. She says when she was growing up, her (now deceased) father was obsessed with her, and her mother hated her for it. “My dad would ask me in front of my mother – ‘who do you love more, me or mom?’ and I was trained – I was a puppet, I knew just what to say: ‘You Dad – you.’”
“No parent should be as close to their child – as my father was with me as a child,” says Alana who describes her relationship with her father as “enmeshment.” She claims he told her to quit high school, did all the speaking for her and didn’t allow her to have friends. At the same time, she recounts that she was her father’s primary caretaker in his last years when he suffered from Alzheimer’s, something Danny says he admires and respects about Alana for having done.
Now she’s claiming her son-in-law, Danny, is the one who hoards Nicole’s time and tries to leave her out of her daughter and granddaughter’s lives.
“Most of the time I work seven days a week – so my time with my family is very limited,” says Danny. He says it’s Alana who puts too many demands on Nicole.
Alana says “I’d like to see us all get along.”
Nicole says she’s stuck in the middle
between looking after her husband and child and taking care of her mom, and just wants their bickering to stop.
Can Dr. Phil help Alana and Nicole to find a healthier balance in their mother-daughter relationship? Tune in to the show
on Wednesday. TELL DR. PHIL YOUR STORY: Betrayed by a spouse or family member?
for local listings.
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