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          Are You Buying Affection?

          July 13, 2005

          Do you use money to buy affection and approval from your friends or family?

        • Do you know what the real issue is? Get real about why you’re doing what you’re doing, and deal with that issue.

        • What is your persistent buying teaching your kids? Don’t underestimate children; they learn from your persistent buying. A real contribution would be to balance your life so you can be there for them. Don’t try to justify neglect by “buying” their love.

        • Your buying habits may be a result of the guilt you feel for not having enough time to spend with your children. Buying is a false substitute and an illusion.

        • Life is about compromise. You must figure out a way to maximize your time with your family. By spending your money to buy affection, you may be putting their future in jeopardy and making the problem worse.

        • Get honest with yourself. Ask yourself, “How insulting is this to me that I have to buy my way into a relationship?” Step up and say, “If they like me, they like me.” You’d rather be healthy alone than sick with someone else. And if you have to buy friends, they’re not much of a friend.

        • Deal with this issue emotionally. Quit hiding behind gifts. This will force you to deal with your REAL problem.

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