Dr. Phil says that most hurdles faced by parents in a nontraditional family structure are the same as those faced by parents in a traditional structure. “Kids are kids, and you shouldn’t assume that because you’re soloing the parenting process or parenting with a partner who’s just come onboard, the tools of parenting and family life are somehow different,” he says.
For my readers who are divorced, living as a single parent, or in a blended family: I recognize that there are a lot of you out there who need a lot of answers, and you need them now. How do I play both mother and father? How much do I push and require from my child during the divorce transition? What role do I play with my stepchildren? And many more questions. The divorce rate in the United States is estimated.by some statisticians to be close to 50 percent. What this means is that millions of parents in America and their children are wrestling with significant problems and needs.
Before I address the challenges your children will face if one of their biological parents is outside the home—or if you’ve introduced a new spouse into the family unit—I want to caution you that the majority of hurdles faced by parents in a nontraditional structure are the same as those faced by parents in a traditional structure. Kids are kids, and you shouldn’t assume that because you’re soloing the parenting process or parenting with a partner who’s just come onboard, the tools of parenting and family life are somehow different. That said, you clearly have some extra challenges to contend with, and extra challenges require extra tools.
That’s what this chapter is all about. I’m going to tell you what I believe is the truth about what you can and must do to create a phenomenal family, even if yours is a divorced family or a blended one. I’m going to give you a separate list of action items here because your situation expressly calls for it. Your job will be to jump into this chapter with a willingness to give it your full attention and focus consciously on the tasks presented. But you can’t stop here. The actions I’ll give you must ultimately fit into a bigger plan, a plan that works for all families, divorced, blended, or with both biological parents in the home. That plan is what you will find on every single page of this book. You must commit to folding into your family life all the tools, actions, and strategies I’m going to give you as we progress through this book. Immerse yourself in this work with a commitment of both heart and soul, and you too will emerge a winner.
Download the full chapter here. TELL DR. PHIL YOUR STORY: Conflict so big it needs a Dr. Phil solution?