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          Self Matters

          What Is Your Personal Truth?

          December 10, 2002

          Dr. Phil speaks with a guest who says her sensitivity to everything is driving her and her family crazy.
          She is an artist who owns a boutique, and criticism from her customers often drives her to tears “right in front of them.” She also bursts into tears while watching movies,causing her 12-year-old to try to comfort her.
          “Being over-sensitive is ruining my spirit,” she says, turning to Dr. Phil for help.
          “Sensitivity is not a bad thing,” says Dr. Phil. “It’s a matter of degree.”
          • Because she works in a subjective field where people criticize her work every day, she sets herself up for judgment from others, which then causes her anguish. If you can’t stand the judgment, why is that your profession?
          • He suggests that she take a congruency test, a three-step process that can help her get closer to understanding what she thinks of herself, and how she can start living more authentically.
          • Do you know who you are, and are you being that person? Or are you giving your power away to others? Is your personal truth distorted? Are others controlling how you feel about yourself? Get to know your authentic self.
          • Decide what your personal truth is. Every single one of us has one ” something we believe about ourselves when nobody else is watching. Our personal truth is what we really say to ourselves when our social mask is off. Once you decide what your personal truth is, then you’ll be less vulnerable to what others say. The stronger you feel about yourself and the more confidence you have, the more susceptibility to what others say will decline.
          • Remind yourself that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. For example, when it comes to his show, Dr. Phil does just that. “That’s why you’ve got a remote control,” he says.
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